>>
|
No. 18923
>>112299
Laziness.
Here jordans response.
"
PLEASE REPOST THIS FAR AND WIDE, THE REPOSTS OF THE PRESS RELEASE HAVE DONE A LOT OF DAMAGE TO MY REPUTATION, PLUS I THINK IT'S GOT A LOT OF GOOD POINTS.
Just recently, I had my name dragged through the mud by Bash Back! a group of queer anarchists located across the country. Just google my name (Jordan Opalanie), and one will find sexual assault allegations lobbed against me by this group, even though I was the one that was assaulted. There are many circumstances that led to this, and I just would like to clear my name, and also to share my feelings of invalidation over this incident.
--Note that I refer to this exfriend that assaulted me as "they" as to not gender them--
In December 2008/January 2009, I was visiting a now exfriend in Michigan, and on New Years Eve, I drove them up to Northern Ontario so that we could have some boozy escapades (they were 20 at the time, old enough to drink in Canada, but not in the US). We ended up sharing a bed at some dingy cheap auberge, which I didn't mind at first, but hey, we were broke and cheap. The first night went off without a hitch, the second night, we ended up at some honky tonk and were drinking our asses off.
TRIGGER WARNING FOR AFTER THE CUT
I decided to go back to the room to retire early (they did not have a DL at the time, and it was a long drive back to their place in Michigan). Around 1am, they come back to the room drunk off their ass and turn in. They then started grabbing me around the waste and fondling me until I tried to wrestle myself out. I was turned over facing away from them in the bed, so there was no mistake on what was going on.
It should be noted that in 2003, I was also sexually assaulted, that time by a teacher at my therapeutic boarding school. After being ignored by several staff members whom I told about the assault (ie: "didn't happen", "not my problem", "that doesn't happen to boys"), I repressed it until I finally came forward in 2008 and reported it to the police. Anyway, I ended up repressing this incident and remained friends with them until sometime in March of 2009, when they decided not to be friends with me anymore.
Around that time, I started getting triggers and flashbacks about what happened, and I was planning on going to a Bash Back! Convergence in Chicago. After discovering the exfriend was about to go to same convergence, I came forward to the organizers. When they approached them, they accused me of sexual assault and banned me and them from the convergence.
I did not know what happened that night that would make them accuse me of sexual assault. Maybe I tossed and turned while I slept, maybe I was struggling to get out and I pushed up against them? I proffered those theories and think they are less likely, but looking back on it now, I began to think; did the perpetrator do this just to try and destroy my chances of going to the BB! convergence? After all, why would I go to the organizers of BB! if I did commit the act, which I didn't. I know I would never rape someone if I was moderately drunk, or even really drunk, because I am avoidant of sexual situations due to the high school incident, even and especially when I am intoxicated. The BB! organizers don't have common sense, and they didn't think I had common sense either.
Anyway, I just ended up making an overnight drive with some people and after I got there, went up to Wisconsin. During that time, I almost threw myself off the O'Hare Oasis. After a fun time in Wisconsin, I drive people back, and I admit, I regret giving the organizers some e-tongue lashings, I wanted nothing to do with BB! and just wanted to heal.
Then, this year, around the same time, BB! had another convergence in Denver. I did not plan on going because of the drama as well as lack of funds. About a week after the convergence ended, Bash Back! put out a press release indicating that in banning people who were accused of sexual assault, they banned someone with the same name as me over a racist mistake, and decided to use my full name and called me a "white person from Philly" (try Native American from New Jersey, although I've got some European in me) and called me out FOR SOMETHING I NEVER DID. The press release was disseminated through various websites, and I have to do some serious damage control, just because of Bash Back's "guilty till a confession is coerced" philosophy. If this is anarchy, then I feel safer in Mexico.
BB! refused to remove the posting, and I think I am going to take legal action against them. They defamed me, AND INVADED MY PRIVACY!! It should also be known that before and during the RNC protests in St. Paul, which I attended, BB! had a chant which was like "We're Here, We're Queer, We'll Fuck Your Children In The Ass". Classy, ain't it?
I also feel like there is an ableist element here. Some of the people who organized the Chicago convergence know I have some mental/neurological issues, and presumed me a rapist, further stigmatizing mental illness as causing violent crimes, just like the organizers of Bash Back! did with the other Jordan over their race.
But most of all, I feel like my status as a victim (as well as my ethnic identity, but I digress) is being erased by a group wanting to smear me. It is enough that they erased my status in private communications, but to publicly put my name out there, it makes me feel like a victim again to be called out for something I never did and have the whole world think that I am sexually violent, even though many friends never thought I was that way when I was drunk and sharing a sleeping space (the only one to do so was the exfriend/assailant, and that was only when I came forward, they conveniently accused me of sexual assault).
I mean, I've heard of people blowing you off and denying it ever happened, but this is the worse
I've begun to feel like all the healing I have tried to do since both incidents is unravelling and old wounds are beginning to open up, I am in crisis mode and ended up contemplating suicide for a few weeks after it, I'm OK now, but I hope I can just put it behind me.
The moral of the story here is that invalidating assault is terrible enough as it is, but to accuse someone of perpetrating something is the lowest of the low.
"
|