Cool. Get that throne of cocks out of your ass and let us gobble them up!

Alright then, here's one of the earliest PMs I recieved from John. I think it sets the tone nicely for the events that transpired.

In the beginning, it was simply a case of asking John questions and having him respond, seeing what new information he could provide.

As you can see, in this particular screenshot, John has taken the liberty of copypasting and numbering questions.

This is pretty interesting. I find it hard to believe A-Log really felt so dismissive about his ED page. I'm sure deep down he was raging.

John was perfectly prepared for this information to be shared with /cwc/, but at that time I decided to hold back because I thought that there might be a chance for more.

And there was... Is anybody interested in seeing A-Log's scripts?

Your dead, John.

>>185851
You'll never catch me, lardass!
Muahahahahahaha!!

>>185847
The way he puts it is quite obvious it was upsetting him. "I can't believe anyone would be so pathetic as to write an ED article about me!"

Basically "You have to be really pathetic and lame to criticize me!"

>>185847
I suspect A-Log was full of false bravado in front of his friends, trying to make out that he wasn't bothered when, in reality, he was heavily heiniehindered by his ED page's existence.

I hope A-Log addresses this betrayal in a brand spankn' new video!

Is nobody interested in the scripts for A-Log's Guptill89 commentary and his sitcom, Life in the '80s?

I would like to see those. I'm sure they'd be hilarious.

  I'll post the script for A-Log's Guptill89 commentary first, because Life in the '80s is fucking long and honestly a bit boring.

For the benefit of those of you who might not have seen the video that A-Log is commentating on, I've embedded it for you.

According to John, one of the reasons A-Log has not yet made this particular commentary is because he wanted to use some female voice actors in it voicing a few characters, but unfortunately for him, he doesn't have any female friends.

>Forevera-log.jpg

A-Log's Commentaries:
Guptill Gets Freaky With Furries


Greetings and salutations to all! This is Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto with yet another commentary. I believe it's time to put Chris-chan on the wayside since the little mistake has vowed to leave the Internet; despite his pleas, he keeps popping up everywhere. But with him out of the picture, it's time for me to go on the warfare against other idiots on the Internet. Today's target is a twenty-something Sonic fan named Dylan Guptill, better known as Guptill89. For you see, back in February, Guptill made a video listing off the Top 10 Hottest Female Characters of Sonic. As you can see, this has spawned a huge amount of controversy towards him, as well as many commentaries. (Ranging from RandomDCE, DarkRaven48, MatttheParanoidKat, my friend SpaceScreaminJohn, the BlackBusterCritic, Jegudiel29ZX, pikachu0Z, LuigimanEntertainment, Roushutsu, and megajames12.) Now for the record, I do have one thing I agree with regarding Guptill: he's partially right about the fault not going to the 4Kids voices of Sonic, just the directors. Even though he sounds similar to Andrew Rannells, I agree with his points. Plus, not every bad anime dub comes from New York City. Having said that... THE GUY'S A FREAK! This Top 10 list is disturbing in it's own right and has brought upon more idiocy from the Sonic fanbase! But before I blow my top, let's start the video already.

(0:00-0:12)

And like that, things are not going to a good start. First off, I highly doubt that Sonic would be attractive to begin with. Secondly, there's too much Sonic yaoi on the Internet that unfortunately makes that statement true.

(0:12-0:19)

Stop, stop, stop. (He said stop.) I highly doubt Sonic would be Leisure Suit Larry in this series. Sure he has lots of girlfriends in the comic continuity, he's more of a free roamer in the games. Plus, as we all know, many fans prefer the Sonic/Sally pairing to begin with; not Sonic/Amy. Sorry guys, just stating the facts.

(0:19-0:31)

Hope you enjoyed that shot of Topaz. That's the only semblence of a human character throughout this whole video. What's wrong, Guptill? Sara's too human for ya?

(0:31-0:38)

Why is it in the day and age that the only thing that mattered in a video game are how big a woman's boobs should be. I blame Dead or Alive for this; before that people actually cared about graphics and gameplay.

(0:38-0:45)

First off, why did you have to film yourself running like a jackass? This is what pisses me off about the Sonic fanbase nowadays: retardation sets in for these poor folk. Second, since you're supposed to be a Sonic fan, that orange juice should've been a chili dog. You've failed to make a good reference! You fail!

(0:45-0:52)

Um... Mario via Donkey Kong?

(0:52-0:55)

Well, DOI!!!

(0:55-1:00)

To be perfectly honest, I cannot find, in the spirit of canon, a 12-year-old pink hedgehog attractive. At least my friend and fellow lemon writer V-Dogg bumps her age up to 18 and older. Besides, I find women like this attractive; or this; or this; or even this. But hey, what do I know. I still haven't found that lucky lady yet in real life. Oh well.

(1:00-1:09)

Many characters from lots of anime have spiky hair; and methinks you never stepped foot at a punk concert before?

Punk Rocker: Oi, you! You with hair like a duck arse! Never seen a spiked mohawk before? (spits) I hate society...

(1:09-1:17)

That's what you can expect when you have a character voiced by Lisa Ortiz! Remember Lina Inverse?

(1:17-1:23)

Oh boy, this is going to be awkward. Really awkward!

(1:23-1:35)

Ok, before I go on, lets suspend belief for a moment: lets pretend that Cosmo isn't a plant creature; lets pretend that she's not an alien; hell, lets pretend that she's not even a cartoon character, but a flesh and blood human being. (brief pause) SHE'S A BLOODY CHILD!!!! WHAT THE HELL'S WRONG WITH YOUR STANDARDS?!?!?!?! I could understand if this is what you're basing your attraction towards her, (shows picture of an adult Cosmo) but still, DUDE!!! That's wrong! I don't even know the correct term for his affliction!

Mini-Mikami: Ecchi!

Thanks Mini-Mikami, you said a mouthful!

>>185866
(1:35-1:44)

In the cartoons, yes. In the comics, however, he had a relationship with Fiona which failed because she's a cyborg. Then there's Barby Koala, but she's older than him. How he got with Mina in the future is beyond me, even if it's been a while since I read the comics.

(1:44-1:48)

Finally, a character of consensual and legal age... and a MILF too! But, it's his sanity I'm attacking.

(1:48-2:00)

Just like interracial relationships are legal in the real world, so too can interrspecies relationships in the Sonic universe. Besides, maybe Vector's a mother lover for all I know.

(2:00-2:11)

But you not only showed her helping Chris fit to his old clothes just now. Plus, I'm sure she helps out her daughter and her friends. Speaking of which, if Cream shows up in this, I'm whipping this out.

(shows footage of Frankie Boyle saying the following:

Frankie Boyle: My fellow pedophiles.)

(2:11-2:17)

From the Babylon Rogues? It's bad enough that they're from one of the least popular Sonic games, but at least they serve their purpose. Plus, she's a little bit too new to be recognizable.

(2:17-2:22)

(shows a picture of Vexus) True that!

(2:22-2:30)

It takes more than brains to be the leader of a group. Not everyone can be Bobby "The Brain" Heenan. The leader would usually have the most strength, the most experience, the most agility; many skills can make anyone a leader not with smarts alone.

(2:30-2:46)

Seriously? You're getting a boner over a bird? A not so attractive bird? Really? Really? Really? I can't say anything other than BlackbusterCritic having a point about how fucking a bird will kill it and this song from a few friends of mine that makes this somewhat appropriate.

(plays "Bird Fucker" by Nuclear Bubble Wrap for a few seconds; chorus only.)

(2:46-2:54)

She was named after a Mayan city? Well, that's one interesting fact he stated throughout this idiocy.

(2:54-3:02)

I'm sure Tikal does something in Sonic Adventure. She sacrifices herself to the Master Emerald to keep Chaos in control. (realizes something) Oops, did I reveal what he's going to say next?

(3:02-3:05)

Because restraining orders weren't invented yet.

(3:05-3:17)

I don't recall him saying anything of importance about why Tikal is attractive. Even if she was a one-shot character, you should've at least given more detail on your reasons. Then again, canonically, she's 14, so...

(3:17-3:25)

Nice impression, bad joke. Here's a better impression of the Count. (audio excerpt of Dave Chappelle's "Seseme Street" bit where he thinks the Count is a pimp.)

(3:25-3:31)

I still remember little of her before I stopped reading the comics, but I still remember her being competition for Sally. Plus, regarding her looks, she looks like any run-of-the-mill pop diva to me. Even then I found that plot contriving.

(3:31-3:40)

How is she more human? She's still a furry to me. Explanation! I need one, mister!

(3:40-3:47)

One of the only good characters coming out of Sonic Rush and Sonic '06. Not to mention one of Bella Hudson's finest roles. But above all that, she's 14. DCE has already pointed this out, but it needs repeating.

(3:47-3:53)

That does sound like a good power to have. No need for a bonfire, I'll toast these marshmellows myself!

(3:53-3:57)

Well, other than melting all the snow off the Himilayas, she wouldn't last too long because now matter how hot her powers are, it's still freezing in the Himilayas!

(3:57-4:01)

Nice going, kid. Way to make an offensive generalization! What are you trying to do, make Tatanka return with another heel turn? He's been a heel twice and failed miserably at it! Besides, a Native American heel would be considered racist nowadays. But I digress...

(4:01-4:06)

I don't think Sega has confirmed them to be a couple. That's just fan speculation at work. Then again, who takes the fans seriously nowadays; especially this fanbase?

(4:06-4:18)

And, again, that's the only attribute he mentions for a girl's attractiveness. However, he still fails to give a reason why he states this.

(4:18-4:32)

I wouldn't be surprised to see her in the Top 3, but still, she has at least some personality than the other girls he mentioned. Now that I think about it, more well known, too.

(4:32-4:37)

Ok, chalk up another arc I missed since stopping on issue 123. Seems intersting, though.

(4:37-4:41)

And this was before Rouge came along. I still remember an edit made in a fan-fic after Rouge's debut. It was a Christmas Carol parody that had Robotnik as Scrooge. Knuckles was used as his nephew, Fred. Near the end, Robotnik visits Knuckles' home for a Christmas party and we see Julie-Su as Fred's wife. Cut to a year or so later, we get the same scene, only with Rouge replacing Julie-Su. Why I still remember this, I don't know. It's still a good example of jumping the gun in thinking that one would be better than the other in relationship that was established in the comics to begin with. But still, it's Guptill we're discussing here, not my experience on the franchise.

(4:41-4:50)

Oh boy! (laughs) This one's a hoot! Out of all the crazy fetishes in the world, he has to have a ponytail fetish! (continues to laugh) This reminds me a bit of HappyHarry's parody of the ending to Avatar. Here's a clip to prove it!

(shows said clip)

See?

(4:50-4:54)

Lame rhyme scheme!

(4:54-4:58)

Other than the fact that, as DCE once put it, she's the queen of all the furries. I think the furry fandom went sky high after her appearance. Either her or Zig-Zag.

(4:58-5:04)

Aren't boots considered clothing as well?

(5:04-5:19)

Ah yes, Antoine. How can I not forget Rob Paulsen at his best with him! True, Antoine was a coward; so much so, I compared him to Owen Hart once. But later on, he matured, grew a spine, and married Bunnie Rabbot; who, for some reason, didn't make to the list. I wonder who would get angry over this?

(shows clip of Donutman960's attack on Richard Kuta, aka AknotholeResident, when he threatens to rape his Sonic plushie and does so, ending with "God. Fucking. Dammit.")

Yep, that would be him.

(5:19-5:30)

Something tells me that Guptill isn't interested in a woman who's dominant. Mommy issues, perhaps?

(5:30-5:38)

And the only one that's working and acceptible, by the way?

(5:38-5:49)

And again, the guy creeps us out with Sally being naked at first. The image of her walking into the melten gold didn't help matters either. Plus, I'm not surprised either that Sally is in the Top 3. I wonder who number 1 will be?

(5:49-6:07)

Place your bets! Place your bets!

(6:07-6:19)

(feign gasp) Why I am not surprised? I agree with his pick, but even I can knew she'll be on top. (beat) Wait a minute...

(6:19-6:21)

Yes! How dare you! How dare you fantasize about real women in the real world; and human women in the comics and anime! How dare you act like a freak!

(6:21-6:29)

In other words, she uses her seduction to get what she wants like many a porn actress will do! That's how you do it in the Valley!

(6:29-6:34)

Hate to burst your bubble buddy, but for the first one, that's hard to believe, since Knux already has Julie-Su in the comics; not to mention she uses his shyness of girls to her advantage. As for her and Shadow, I do believe they're a couple, but I see them more like brother and sister in the terms of their relationship. Well, not as bad as these two. (shows picture of Anthy and Akio)

(6:34-6:42)

No duh, Einstein! What do you think her plotline was in her first appearance in Sonic Adventure 2?

>>185867
(6:42-6:50)

Ok, that's one thing I will agree with him on. Censorship does suck. Besides, I'm sure some shows got away with busty characters in a kids show. But then again, in the case of Sonic X, I think the otaku had more than parents fearing Little Jimmy getting his first hardon from Rouge's bosom to worry about; such as editing Maria's death so it makes her look like she didn't get shot. You can blame these two for that unnecessary edit; they didn't edit guns out in the 1980's, as far as I know.

(6:50-6:56)

Correction, Amy wore a lot of different clothes as well; not to mention her old appearance in Sonic CD. So that logic is flawed.

(6:56-7:09)

(imitates buzzer noise) Wrong! Only number three holds enough water to your statement.

(7:09-7:14)

Yes, I'm sure Sonic Team is really proud of what they've done these days. I wonder if they knew? I wonder if they knew that a character would not only define a generation, but would also bring forth a fanbase that would be known as the most insane, out-of-control, numbskulled idiots that call themselves members of the Sonic fanbase. This list wasn't insightful in any way, shape or form, and judging from Dylan's perspective, he needs counseling. Might I recommend my therapist to snap you straight?

(7:14-7:20)

With some of them underage. As a matter of fact, the only two women that are above the age of consent (in the case of NYC, 17), are Rouge and Vanilla. Sally, Mina and Julie-Su barely scrape this age limit when you talk about canon. But then again, it's not all about canon with him now, isn't it?

(7:20-7:27)

Well, at least he used a different song from Rick Astley for once. As much as I like "Never Gonna Give You Up", it went on to overkill when you do a Rickroll.

Now in the interest of fairness, I'm going to call several notable females of the Sonic franchise, game and comic, and see what they think. Lien-Da, of the Dark Legion, you're on the air.

Lien-Da: Greetings, you little flesh-blob. I've heard of this human's little top ten list and it sickens me to the core!

Because of the fact that he made one to begin with?

Lien-Da: Hell no! That little fool had the nerve to put my half-sister on the list! At number three no less! How dare he deny a beautiful echidna such as I? Julie couldn't handle a lightswitch compared to me! That little-- (phone line cuts off before she finishes her gripe.)

Lara-Le?

Lara-Le: As a mother, I'm shocked and appalled by this sickening display that he calls a countdown. I feel sorry for that plant girl, Cosmo. Aurora have mercy on his soul if he decides to place my little Kneecaps in there.

Speaking of mothers, Vanilla?

Vanilla: I'm a little dumbfounded that he placed me there to begin with. I mean, I am easy on the eyes, and that Vector boy has been wooed by me, but that doesn't mean that I should be on this countdown.

Cream: Mommy, why are you on this countdown?

Vanilla: Cream, sweetie, whoever did this isn't in his right mind.

Cream: Why am I not on the countdown?

Vanilla: You're too young, dear.

Cream: Aww...

Bunnie Rabbot?

Bunnie: Oh my stars and gardens! Why did this Yankee put Sally girl in there? Ah'm still glad I didn't step foot in those waters, but if that guy puts me in their, Ah'll give him Southern Justice, Mobian-style! Listen to me straight, shug!

Rouge, your comments?

Rouge: Well, for starters, I'm glad that the boy has taste in women. I mean, who wouldn't want to consider someone of this body type attractive?

Sally: Oh please, Rouge! You don't understand the problems this boy has!

Rouge: Come on Sally, you're just jealous that you're in second place. You can't compete with perfection!

Sally: Come off it, you whore! I'm a woman that thinks on her toes; you're just a walking pair of tits that pretends to be a treasure hunter!

Rouge: (angry) Don't take that tone with me! It's not my fault that many of the Sonic fans forgot about you after the show ended!

Sally: (defensive) But I'm still in the comics; that counts!

Amy: (appears of nowhere with her hammer) How dare you think you're prettier than me! I'm supposed to be with my little Sonie-poo!

Sally: Back off, you! At least my coupling makes more sense!

Amy: How so?!

Sally: You're twelve!

Rouge: And I'm sure you're the better choice despite that break-up a while back?

(it now gets to the point where all three of them are squabbling amongst themselves, at which the lines would be ad-libbed. A-Log couldn't take it any more and ends the call.)

Ok, one more character. Julie-Su, you're with A-Log.

Julie-Su: Hey Anthony. I saw that video you sent me and I noticed something odd about him.

Which is?

Julie-Su: Is this guy serious about ponytails?

Yes, he's that serious.

Julie-Su: (disgusted) Ew! And I thought Lien-Da had it bad for me when I was in the Dark Legion. This kid's a freak! Besides, who in God's name has an obsession with ponytails anyway? I know Knuckles wouldn't think of me like that! And I can blast this guy in a million pieces with my laser-gun!

Agreed. Thanks for your time, Julie. Say hi to the gang for me.

Julie-Su: You're welcome. (hangs up)

And that's it. The jury's out on Guptill and even the girls of Sonic are turned off by him! The lesson for today is that if you're going to do something this stupid, keep it to yourself or keep it in your fan-art and fics, and not to the rest of the world. As for me, I will say my goodbyes and end this commentary. So this is Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto--

(phone rings)

Huh? Someone's calling me now? (picks up the receiver) Hello?

???: HOW DARE THAT PERVERT DO A TOP TEN LIST WITH GIRLS OF THIS AGE!!!! THIS IS UNHOLY MADNESS!!!!

Wait a minute, is this Linda Maltinie from Snowboard Kids?

Linda: (angry) YOU'RE DARN RIGHT IT'S ME! HOW CAN HE LIVE WITH HIMSELF FOR DOING SUCH A LIST! CAN YOU IMAGINE THAT FREAK ADDING ME, NANCY, OR EVEN THAT BRAT NICOLE TO A LIST LIKE THAT!!! I'LL SUE HIS BUTT TO OBLIVION!!!!

I know but...

Linda: (angry) DOESN'T HE KNOW WHAT PEDOPHILIA IS? MY RICH DADDY TELLS ME WHAT HAPPENS TO THOSE MEN AND THEY GIVE THEM A PUNISHMENT SO SEVERE, ALL YOU NEED IS TONY HAWK'S AUTOGRAPH TO MAKE IT COMPLETE!!!

Anyway, I gotta get going now. A-Log out.

Linda: (angry) AND ANOTHER THING, YOU FOOL--

I wouldn't be one to defend SpacescreaminJohn or A-Log but I think OP is trolling.
OP, prove to us that you didn't just set up that spacescreamingjohn91 channel yourself.

A typical A-Log commentary. I wonder if A-Log is aware of the recently leaked Chris videos. I'm sure he'd like to commentate on cake farts. Knowing how aroused he was while watching the sex tape.

I don't follow A-log, But this is a nice dump, OP.

UNLESS YOU'RE JOHN AND YOU'RE TRYING TO TROLL SHIELD

I know that hypocrisy is par for the course with A-Log, but I just want to point out that this is a commentary wherein Anthony 'A-Log' LoGatto, infamous furfag and sick fuck, rants at Guptill89, calling him a freak for finding these Sonic female characters attractive - regardless of the fact that he himself has written fapfiction in which his fursona's fucked a couple of them.

>>185870
Sadly, the account SpaceScreamJohn91 is closed as of a few days ago. John wants to distance himself from A-Log and that was one of his steps towards doing it.

However, I still have plenty more cocks to drop which should prove to you that all of this is TRUE and HONEST.

>>185875
Nah, that ain't me. Can see your thinking, but no.

I've still got to copy and paste the script for the pilot episode of A-Log's sitcom, Life in the '80s but unless the demand is huge I'm currently rather disinclined to do so, since it's really fucking long and not terribly funny compared to A-Log's other stuff. If people insist, I might post it later if I have time.

Besides which, it was only a few nights later that this happened. Which, personally, I think is more interesting...

The download link in the screencap is long since dead, along with Megaupload, but if you're interested don't worry.

http://www.4shared.com/music/oFxV1rSk/A-Log_Skype_Call_1__4-1-2012_.html

You can find it here, now.

>>185886
Don't suppose you could upload that somewhere else? That site requires you to create an account or download a .exe file.

Shit, I'm sorry, /cwc/. My bad.
Give me a minute and I'll get back to you.

>an epic ween inner circul stonecutter sitting on a throne of cocks

>>185876
Well, yeah, but then you see him in his moronic way really concentrating on Sonics love life in comics and other forms of media. A-Log is just a fat female 13 year old shipper at heart, but really just wants to seem o' so cool for youtube.

  OP here, back again.

I've had a terrible time trying to upload this thing to file sharing websites, but never mind. I've embedded a YouTube video of it.

In this call, we hear how A-Log spent his New Year's Eve, his thoughts on the MsUmlaut Q&A and his belief that the trolls want him to shoot himself. He also makes a homophobic joke which goes down like a lead balloon.

Hope that this is enjoyable and interesting for you.

>>185936
>Mfw A-Log whines "Oh come ooooooon! I'm nothing like Chris!!!"

>>185936
>>"Oh come ooooooon! I'm nothing like Chris!!!"

I should mention some other things that, according to John, A-Log said during the Skype call that he didn't record. At the end, he told John that not only does he plan to still do the Jared Milton and Guptill89 commentaries, but he wants to do a commentary on Richard Kuta as well because he wants to get revenge for Kuta taking down his video.

Yeah...

Anyway, I went on to ask how John felt about ISLAVERDE29 and what his relationship to him was, since in the call he sounded as though the two of them are not on favorable terms. This was what he had to tell me...

>>185936
I just want to point out that according to this call while we were all out partying or spending time with our loved ones on New Years Eve, A-Log was sitting at home listening to his own radio show. Presumably alone.

Didn't read the thread, didn't want a virus. - Oh A-log.

Same ol' alog being in Denial...

>>185947
Funny you should mention that, anon, because the very next message I received from John was regarding a personal message John had sent A-Log on Facebook asking him why he was so obsessed with Chris-chan, why he still references Chris-chan whenever given the chance, why he thinks Chris-chan makes spasm look bad, etc.

A-Log's reply was surprisingly lucid and self-aware.

I'll reproduce it here in redtext for you.

>"Wow... I really didn't expect this, but at least you took the time to ask. Well, to be honest, and I know I'm going to feel like a douchebag admitting this, but I have little to no self-esteem in my system. I've done some stupid things in the past and due to my good memory, I've been forcing myself to remember every screw-up I've done from school and life.

>When I first heard of Chris-chan and Sonichu via DCE and Lilly's videos on the topic, I was intrigued to find someone who is more messed up than I am. I apologize for sounding like a douche, but I was happy knowing that there was someone who was worse off than I am: from a creative standpoint and from a moral standpoint. In short, I felt like I was no longer the most screwed up person in the world.

>You're also right on nobody outside the internet knowing of Chris' existence, or lack therof. I learned that the hard way in one of my stand-up pieces back in college. Plus, spasm isn't really that big a deal in real life to begin with. In Chris' case, I just didn't want to be mistaken for retardation.

>Mostly, I blame the fact that I can't let go of anything, no matter how trivial. Once more, due to good memory, or in this case, doing away with my scapegoat. I know you're going to be angry with me over this revelation, but I can understand why.

>Maybe it is time for me to let it all go. I know Chris and his pathetic little creation Sonichu is my example of what not to do in the creative world, and I'll admit having my own faults. I'm still unsure on whether or not his trial would go longer after April 5th, but you're right once more: maybe I should let the little jackanape go.

>My family was correct on how he doesn't really affect my life, and I wished I would've listened to them better. I was happy that there was some dipstick worse than I am, but I still fear turning into him. I'm sure you'll understand.

>I'm still keeping my promise on no more Chris-chan videos once I get the GMail accounts back up and working (my AOL started messing with me until I reset both the password and the security question; don't ask; still not a hacker).

>I just hope you don't hate my guts after reading my admission and break contact with me. You're one of the best friends I got on the World Wide Web... and I'm still happy that I inspired you to make videos as well. The fact that I inspire someone makes me happy inside.

>Hope this answers your questions, John. If there is anything I missed, please let me know.

>Sincerely,
>Anthony LoGatto"

After reading that, I kinda felt bad for the guy.

That last few sentences were very sad.

That's about the most tragic thing I think I've ever heard. How marvelous.

The difference between A-Log and Chris-chan is that while they both created self-inserts that served pretty much solely as wish-fulfillment and Chris did draw numerous images with girls he liked wanting to have sex with him, and basically gave his own skewed, warped version of events in his life, it encompassed a number of different wishes. His desire to be respected, his desire to have super powers, his desire to see everyone he hates crushed and defeated and shown as dumber than him.

A-Log's self-insert just fucks porn stars and cartoon characters he's attracted to in the same way over and over again. I actually think that's worse.

Of course everything about Sonichu was terrible and completely uncreative and self-centered, but he attempted to build a whole world for himself, and imitate stories and characters he'd seen in various cartoons he liked. A-Log just tried to fuck them.

>>185955
It really amazes me how his life was totally revolves around Chris to the point where his family has to intervene for him to stop digging a deeper hole. I can tell that he has self-esteem issues and its sad to see that his life was very similar to his and he had to pick on Chris just because he is older than him and they have the same similarities. I mean this is fucked up shit.

  Those of you troubled by A-Log's apparent sudden realization of how tragic he is will be relieved to learn that this is appears to be a complete freak occurance. Literally, within days of new Chris-chan cocks being leaked, he was back to his usual obnoxious self, personing around the CWCki and ranting to his friends about what an awful individual Chris-chan is.

In typical lolcow fashion, he learned nothing.

In any case, here is the second call I received from John. This time, NeuGristle87 pops up as a guest star and A-Log thrills us with some amazing impressions and a dramatic reading of a snippet of Sonichu Sub-Episode 5.

Man, a-log's impressions are almost as bad as the ones Chris does.

>"Oh, I am the next Chris-chan!"
There's a quote for the ED page.

>>185971
Who are A-Log's impressions supposed to be?

>>185973
Russian people I guess, that's all I got out of that mess. And the Irish I think.

>>185966
And just for a second I was about to feel sorry for this guy. He would keep on talking about Chris once again and do really bad impressions as if he was the center of the attention. He knew why people are following him and he thinks that he doesn't deserve to be on there.

>>185966
>5:00
>"Next Chris-chan, he's EVIL! He's the biggest piece of EVIL!"

Why do these people do this? I know there's the whole theory of "They take the 'sins' shit from CWCki seriously" but, that's like an incredibly minor part of that wiki. Where do these people get the idea Chris (and to a lesser extent them) get trolled due to people thinking they're bad or "evil"? Do they just make it up themselves?

>>185985
I think these people tend to think in terms of fantasy and fiction, not realising that real life doesn't work like it does in their animes. If someone is opposing them, they must be evil or mean.

Sort of like how Chris believed that all trolls were cruel, grouchy, alcoholic villains.

After recieving that second call, I asked John a few more questions. Here are the results of that little Q&A session.

>>185987
Q&A cont'd.

>>185990
I hope he does respond to the trolls in some way.

He won't respond, he is too much of a gigantic fat pussy and thinks that even posting here will blow up his computer due to troll voodoo magic.

>>185973
I figured it out I think. He's doing impressions of Hetalia(that anime where people are named after countries?). It makes sense, since A-Log is obsessed with anime.

>>186015
Unfortunately you are correct

>>186015
So how accurate are A-Log's impressions, my weeby friend?

>>186018
I don't know. Never seen the show myself, I'm just aware of it's existence. Knowing A-Log, it's probably awful.

>>186018
Spaghetti and meatballs!

>>186015
Wait, isn't ADF also interested in some characters from Hetalia?

>>186030
It wouldn't surprise me. It's a popular show among weeaboos.

>>185990
More Q&A with John, this time on the subjects of WackyBen and A-Log's employment.

>>186036
I wonder what A-Log does. I'm surprised he hasn't mentioned it as a defense against people who tell him he is like Chris.

  >>185955
....And then A-Log got his own Persona.

>>186038
Didn't he do some college radio thing?

>>186041
I hope that doesn't count as a job. I don't want to believe he gets paid for that shit.

>>186038
I wondered too, so I asked John more. It turns out he was working here: http://www.possibilitees1.org/

Possibili-Tees is a T-shirt printing company based in Staten Island providing work experience for people with disabilities like spasm. It's not really a job, it's more of a training course. Nobody gets paid, it's all voluntary. An uncharitable person might call it a daycare center for retards.

A-Log apparently went there for a day to see what it was all about and for some reason was rejected.

Say what you want about Chris, but at least when he was working at Wendy's that was a real job he held for more than a day and he made an actual wage. A-Log's just fucking around.

>>186043
Even if he doesn't get paid, I'd bet he'd still consider that a job. Probably he'd say that it is preparing him for his future career.
Does anybody know if he actually commissions artists for work? If he does, then presumably he has some income. Probably hard to beg mom for money to buy toon porn. Or maybe she doesn't care. He seemed to imply that she knows of and is OK with hentai in his convention video.

Damn...looks like I got some explaining to do.

  >>186045
As I understand it, A-Log lives out of his mom's pocket. According to John, he apparently did try to apply for disability welfare (the very thing that he and his cronies cry foul over people like Sailormoonred1 receiving), but was turned down because his spasm was not low functioning enough for him to be considered sufficiently disabled.

In any case, I think it's high time for the third call. This one has a special guest appearance from Wacky Ben.

The quality on this one isn't really up to much, so you might have to listen very closely.

>>186053
A-Log talks about wanting to go into voice acting and whatnot. I'm sure I know the answer, but has he ever bothered to take any vocal training classes and the like? Or is he one of those people who thinks he has some mystical talent that needs no refining and need only wait around to be discovered?

>>186054
I'm sure he's hoping to be discovered on YouTube or something. Like that will ever happen.

>>186053
Good lord, that bit where they were talking to WackyBen about MsUmlaut was awkward.

>SpaceScreaminJohn: She hates you more than she hates A-Log.
>WackyBen86: Okay.

>>186058

Yeah...I know. I debated whether or not to tell him. Probably would have been if I didn't, but hey...what's done is done.

>>186051
>>186061
Is this the real SpaceScreaminJohn?

*Probably would have been if I didn't tell him

>>186063

Yes, yes it is.

>>186065
Can you provide proof, John?

Just to prove that this is actually me, here's a photo I just took of myself.

I'm not well acquainted with the A Log drama but this thread caught my eye. What's your deal, John? From those conversations you sound like the relatively normal dude in a room full of spastics. How come you got buddy-buddy with them in the first place?

Sorry for my ignorance folks.

Also lol, so A Log knows you brought cocks to /cwc/? How did he react?

>>186071
No timestamp? No sign reading "Hi /cwc/" or something?

Thanks John. So what did you mean you have some explaining to do?

>>What's your deal, John? From those conversations you sound like the relatively normal dude in a room full of spastics. How come you got buddy-buddy with them in the first place?
At first, it was because of a common hatred of Chris-chan. I first found out about him back in January 2010. I looked up rant videos about CWC and A-Log's commentaries were some of the first I found. I liked them, he and I talked on YouTube, and then soon on Skype, and we just became friends.

However, times have changed. I haven't cared about CWC since that whole Tomgirl hippie circle started. I've moved on from hating Chris-chan.

>>No timestamp? No sign reading "Hi /cwc/" or something?

Pic related, is that better?

>>So what did you mean you have some explaining to do?

Well, of course A-Log wants to know what the deal is (BTW, he and I are corresponding on FaceBook right now) and no doubt so will Ben, Gristle, and ISLAVERDE.

>>186084
What does A-Log have to say about all this? Care to share his messages?

>>186084
And is Ben aware of his little Q/A?

John, I'm glad you flipped on A-Log. You seem like a sorta cool dude.

>>186086
Ben's Q/A was dildos. We got NOTHING out of him, and this is coming from one of the guys who was part of asking him questions. He's a boring krapple, not particularly offensive, but he's of no use to us in any way.

Any hope of Islaverde calming the fuck down?

Hey, by the way, did he see that video summary of his videos?

>>186089
Well, that's Ben for ya. Always beating around the bush.

>>186091
Maybe he does it on the internet because he can't get near the bush in real life.

>>186090
islaverde calming down? Yea right.

>>186094
I know, I realized how impossible that was the second I posted it.

You still there John? I guess your still discussing the situation with A-Log on FaceBook?

few random thoughts here:

Doesn't Wackyben have a GF? I swore I saw it on his FB when I found it on the ED "Friends of A-log" page but if you check it now, it doesn't mention it. dunno if this was before or after the whole deal with MsUmalut tho.

I noted that ISLAVERDE29 works on a military base, at a commissary, yeah he's a night stocker but the fact he has access to a military base is pretty troubling...

and lastly... wow just wow...good game john, good game.

Yo SpaceScreamin, as long as you don't turn out to be some tranny pretending to be an indian girl who constantly namedrop their fetish, I must say you're definitely a pretty cool guy!

You should hang wit da kool kids klub, ma nig!

>>186112

Why is A log hanging around the RJ bandsma trolling crew?

So, he troll shields by hanging around with A-Log and HATING THAT DANG DIRTY CHRIS CHAN, and now he troll shields by throwing A-Log under the bus and trying to act buddy-buddy with /cwc/. Is this the life cycle of an A-Log Friend? Exact same thing that happened with MsUmlaut.

>>186119
Why are you taking these cocks and shoving them so far up your ass it hurts?

>>186119

I know that I'm not perfect. I know that I am responsible for my fair share of krapplery. And I'm willing to owe up to it. I'm done some stupid shit too.

Hey guys, still here. Had to step out for a moment.
>>”What does A-Log have to say about all this? Care to share his messages?”
No. Right now our conversation it’s a bit on the personal side. Sorry if it seems like I’m hoarding cocks, but this is something that I'm not going to share.

>>”And is Ben aware of his little Q/A?”
Well, A-Log mentioned to me that he talked to Ben about it. Don’t recall what happened afterwards.

>>”Any hope of Islaverde calming the fuck down? Hey, by the way, did he see that video summary of his videos?”
Well, he got pissed at me one time simply because I subbed to Duane’s DUANESKIP1 account. All signs point to “don’t count on it.” I don’t talk to WackyBen86 and Islaverde that much, so I’m not sure if Islaverde saw that video or not.

>> “Doesn’t Wackyben have a GF?”
Last time I checked, he does. But again, I hardly ever talk to WackyBen.

>>186121
You're alright.

What made you decide to spill the beans on Alog and do this Q/A

ITT: taking advantage of severe troll shielding

feels great, man

>>“Why is A log hanging around the RJ bandsma trolling crew?”
No idea, but to be honest I had no idea that RJ Bandsma was ever relevant.

>>“ What made you decide to spill the beans on Alog and do this Q/A?”
I’ve done some soul-searching and some self-reflection in the past few months. I thought it would be time to seriously think about my future and put all of this behind me.

Alright, that’s it for today. I’m calling it a night. I’ll be back tomorrow morning.

  If John's going to turn in, here's the fourth call, this time featuring special guest, ISLAVERDE29.

This call's a bit boring in places as A-Log persons on and on about wrestling for a good long while. John decided to keep that just to give us an idea on what's it like talking to A-Log whenever he's not talking about Chris-chan or his trolls. Recently, whenever he and John would talk wrestling, A-Log would pull up wrestling articles and read the entire article aloud to John, interjecting his own comments whilst doing so.

If only A-log could post in here... then it would be perfect.

>>186174
Too bad he is afraid of those nasty viruses.

>>186176
Actually, according to this call >>186172 A-Log has actually been lurking here for quite a while now. ISLAVERDE29 apparently visits daily. Who knows, you might've actually said HI A-LOG to the real deal at some point!

I was curious as to how long John had been lurking /cwc/ and what lolcows he had been following if any, so I asked him. Here's what he said.

OK, fuck it.

Does A-Log really think that the trolls want to kill him? I remember reading that he thought that the eventual goal for him was a bullet with his name on it or something.

>>186202
I always thought that A-Log assumed that all the trolls thought of him the same way that he thinks of Chris - as someone evil to be vanquished, someone they hate and want to see suffer, hence his belief that the trolls wanted to kill him.

OP here. I kind of want to wrap this up now and I'm coming to the end of all the cocks I've got.

As I've said before, I can't really be bothered to release 'Life in the '80s' A-Log's self-penned sitcom, because it's very, very long and there's really very little in it that could potentially be amusing. If you're absolutely desperate for more cocks, I might post it, but really, it's not up to much.

In the meantime, I have a chatlog from a Skype chat between A-Log and SpaceScreaminJohn...

>>186207
[2/26/12 8:53:26 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Guessing you're on your iPad?
[2/26/12 8:53:34 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Yeah...
[2/26/12 8:53:41 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Well, technically my iTouch.
[2/26/12 8:54:18 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: I see. BTW, I looked around the /cwc/ forum and noticed that someone claiming to have my script for the Guptill commentary.
[2/26/12 8:54:28 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Really?
[2/26/12 8:54:56 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Yeah. I only remember giving the script to you to look over, as well as sending it to several potential VA's for the Sonic girls.
[2/26/12 8:55:52 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: I doubt it would be Lillylivers, since she wasn't happy on how I brought the trolls from /cwc/ over to WingerDinger and destroyed it, but still knows I'm a nice guy in the end.
[2/26/12 8:56:07 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Who would I piss off that much for them to threaten leaking the script?
[2/26/12 8:56:34 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Wait...LilyLivers thought that you were the one who brought the trolls over to WingerDinger?
[2/26/12 8:56:52 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Again, Lilly's out of the question since she is still is friends with me on FB.
[2/26/12 8:57:00 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: That's what she told me. Hold on.
[2/26/12 8:57:58 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Huh...that's weird.
[2/26/12 8:58:04 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: I know.
[2/26/12 8:58:09 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Maybe they're bluffing.
[2/26/12 8:58:59 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Hope so. Anyway, here's what Lilly said during my FB message to hear and several VA's I know.
[2/26/12 8:59:36 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: LillyLivers: A-Log, are you serious? Look, I'm just going to be as blunt as I can be without sounding like a cock. You have attracted the wrong sort of attention. You yourself are as infamous as that video. Normally, I would do this in private, but these ladies have a right to know what they could be getting into before they accept any sort of roles from you. I'm not doing this to be cruel. I'm not doing this to be unkind. But if they get a site hacked, or they end up having to deal with stupid shit online as a result of just BEING in your commentary, then they need to know why.


You were being followed by "trolls" everywhere you went online as a result of your (IRL, which amazes me ) Chris Chan standup, which led them to WD, which then caused the site to be hacked. They only hacked the site because YOU were on it. They followed you there. There are other things that are far too explicit to mention, so I'll leave all of that out. They planned a takedown by trying to find out when all of the moderators would be offline by trollbaiting them and seeing how fast their accounts would get banned.

I'm not here to dampen anyone's chances of getting a role they've wanted for a very long time for just a few lines in a silly little commentary. Ladies, by all means, if you want to do this, go right ahead. If you don't care, by all means, enjoy recording and have fun with whatever roles you are given. I'm just giving you all a fair warning of what you could potentially get yourself into if you do this. I know some of you are professional voice actresses who have websites of your own, and I don't think they should go just because somebody had to take it down and be a prick to you just because you are in HIS commentary. Then that's one less thing to put on your resume if you're looking to build a reel or get hired elsewhere. I'm not doing this to be unprofessional. I'm doing this because I'm know you guys either are professional or WANT to be.

Good luck to all of you.
[2/26/12 9:02:58 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Huh...that's intriguing. But you didn't have that many trolls after you that time.
[2/26/12 9:03:45 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: I didn't know how much.

>>186210
[2/26/12 9:04:01 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Here's what I said to Lilly.
[2/26/12 9:04:34 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Lilly, thanks for getting in contact with me again. This is pretty surprising to me. For starters, I have regretted doing the stand-up on Chris-chan (and yes, my timing needs some fine tuning), but I'm surprised that I had an indirect cause of WingerDinger's demise, and for that, I'm sorry. I thought it was mostly Conjopi's doing. But as of late, I haven't been receiving any attacks by trolls. I've also still received some positive feedback on several videos of mine as well. So, since you're all contributing voices on this commentary, you don't have anything to worry about. Besides, at least I'm smart enough to 1) ignore the trolls and 2) give you option of being credited under your YouTube name (or other aliases from sites you're in).

Lilly, again, I'm sorry if I was indirect cause of this, and I deeply regret doing the stand-up video.
[2/26/12 9:05:15 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: LillyLivers: Alright, but do realize that commentaries are very volatile to others and are made in a way that attract attention. Just be careful. You're not a bad guy, A-Log. You just have to make sure you lay low enough to hug the Earth.
[2/26/12 9:05:55 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Lillylivers: Oh, my. I'm extremely sorry. I retract my previous statements. It seems I skipped over nearly a paragraph in my haste. I didn't realize everything has stopped. Ladies, I highly apologize for any gist of unprofessionalism you may have experienced as a result of me digging deeper into that which is no longer current, nor does it no longer hold any merit. Accept my deepest apologies, all of you. Also, A-Log, I'm glad everyone has decided to leave you be. Again, you're a nice guy. Just be careful out there. I don't want anyone to have a crappy time online (Or IRL, I know some of these guys and they HAVE gone that far) because a few choice people decide to be idiots. It's really unfair that things have to be this way sometimes.

Voice acting should be about having fun and exploring means of self expression. Not constantly looking over your shoulder regarding who is saying or doing what to who. Unfortunately, some people would not have it that way and want to sour everyone else's experiences. That is most unreasonable to people trying to build a resume and make a career out of what they want to do, especially when it is already a competitive field to enter, even worse if you LIVE in a major city where there used to be voice acting, and then it all just...dies. Then you have to go all the way out to another state, do other things, yadda yadda, only to face more competition. This is a livelihood for some people, and resume building can be a tricky business.

Good luck, A-Log. Hopefully you can get something good off of the ground.

Have an excellent day.
[2/26/12 9:06:59 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: You say that LilyLivers is friends with you on FaceBook right?
[2/26/12 9:07:25 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Yes. Still is.
[2/26/12 9:07:35 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Does she know about your current trolling situation?
[2/26/12 9:07:46 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Not that I know of.
[2/26/12 9:07:59 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Oh okay.

>>186211
[2/26/12 9:08:11 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Just curious, though, does your family know about the trolling?
[2/26/12 9:08:54 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: So far, I only told this to my sisters and my dad.
[2/26/12 9:09:24 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Oh wow...and what about your mother?
[2/26/12 9:10:05 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Other than telling her I've pissed off half the Internet, no mention of ED and the Oedipus Complex.
[2/26/12 9:10:46 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Okay good. Who want her knowing about that.
[2/26/12 9:10:48 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Note that I kept it vague.
[2/26/12 9:10:58 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: *Wouldn't want her to know that
[2/26/12 9:11:02 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Of course.
[2/26/12 9:11:31 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Besides, every dumb thing I've done in life I'll admit... right after my mom dies. That way, she won't choke me to death while being dead.
[2/26/12 9:11:58 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: And also, proof that I'm still friends with Lilly: I saw her and a friend of her's being tagged by Barogun.
[2/26/12 9:12:11 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: I see.
[2/26/12 9:12:44 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: BTW, could you do me a favor? I've been meaning to ask this of you for a while.
[2/26/12 9:12:51 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Yes?
[2/26/12 9:13:55 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: I recorded Michael Cole's Gooker award entry at Wrestlecrap and I'm wondering if you could help me make the video for the audio? Visuals, gifs, etc.
[2/26/12 9:14:43 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Umm...I don't know, dude. I've been really busy as of late. I haven't had much time to myself.
[2/26/12 9:14:53 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Understood.
[2/26/12 9:15:05 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Wait...does that mean you can access your YouTube account again?
[2/26/12 9:15:51 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Not yet. I tried to use the Google Password Decryptor last night and, for some reason, was installed in sandbox mode.
[2/26/12 9:16:05 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Oh.
[2/26/12 9:16:10 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: I don't know what that means, but I'm sure it's an odd thing.
[2/26/12 9:16:50 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: For some reason, and I'm not sure if I pressed something wrong or if it was the sandbox mode, when I tried to get the accounts, it claimed that it's not known on this computer.
[2/26/12 9:17:17 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Bullshit! I tried earlier today, and they still said that the passwords were changed days ago.
[2/26/12 9:18:23 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: I'm going to try again when my sister's boyfriend comes over. Let him see what I'm doing. If all else fails, I'll just have to answer some questions and pay with a credit card. Google is a bitch when it comes to proving who you are.
[2/26/12 9:18:39 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: :-( Ouch man
[2/26/12 9:18:46 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: That really sucks...
[2/26/12 9:19:07 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Have you ever tried switching e-mails addresses on the ALogTV account?
[2/26/12 9:19:16 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Right. Plus, I don't think it was actually installed outside of that sandbox thing.
[2/26/12 9:19:29 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: I haven't figured out who as of yet.
[2/26/12 9:19:49 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Let alone having my AOL SN be the e-mail address in question.
[2/26/12 9:20:18 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: How much do you have to pay to Google if you can't fix the problem?
[2/26/12 9:20:35 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: $3. Last time I tried.
[2/26/12 9:20:49 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Oh, well $3 isn't too bad, but still.
[2/26/12 9:21:10 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: I know. If it was $30, I would get scared.
[2/26/12 9:21:19 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: It could worse; I could sue Google.
[2/26/12 9:21:21 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Now THAT would suck.

>>186212
[2/26/12 9:21:52 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Right.
[2/26/12 9:22:17 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: In the meantime, I still have access to my Blip account.
[2/26/12 9:22:27 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: So you'll upload videos there?
[2/26/12 9:22:36 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: For now, yes.
[2/26/12 9:23:02 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Because I'm worried that if I make an alt account, the time limits would be strict unless I have a certain amount of videos.
[2/26/12 9:23:09 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: If that still happens, at least.
[2/26/12 9:23:32 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: If you make an alternate account, you can get around the time limit just by giving them your phone number.
[2/26/12 9:23:56 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Wouldn't the fail trolls try to get it?
[2/26/12 9:24:03 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Or is it protected?
[2/26/12 9:24:28 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: It's protected I'm sure. Only Google will see it, but it won't show up anywhere.
[2/26/12 9:24:48 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Glad to know. I really don't want to suffer prank calls up the wazoo.
[2/26/12 9:25:06 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Yeah.
[2/26/12 9:25:28 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Speaking of those who've suffered prank calls up the wazoo, did you see the leaked vids?
[2/26/12 9:25:46 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: What, you mean CWC?
[2/26/12 9:25:49 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Yep.
[2/26/12 9:26:36 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Honestly, they're really sad to look at. I think he really has lost his mind.
[2/26/12 9:26:46 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: I concur.
[2/26/12 9:26:53 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Of course, cheese conies are having a field day with Chris's coney video.
[2/26/12 9:27:06 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Screaming like Angry Joe?
[2/26/12 9:27:42 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Also, if the vids were shown in court, would the court plead insanity on him?
[2/26/12 9:27:49 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Maybe...
[2/26/12 9:28:33 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Oh, and the Angry Joe reference was when he shouted "NO!" several times in "Suburban Knights".
[2/26/12 9:28:40 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: That's what I meant.
[2/26/12 9:28:50 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Oh yeah, I remember that. -_- It was really grating.
[2/26/12 9:29:19 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Right.
[2/26/12 9:29:24 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: ALogIsAHuegkrapple, TerranceBogard, and GreggMays64 are having a lot of fun pissing off the cheese conies in the comments.
[2/26/12 9:29:37 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Nice to see them not aiming the spotlight on me for once.
[2/26/12 9:29:57 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Hey, did you know ThatDisembodiedVoice closed his YouTube account?
[2/26/12 9:30:04 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Yep.
[2/26/12 9:30:11 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: I laughed my ass off because of that.
[2/26/12 9:30:18 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: I wonder what happened?
[2/26/12 9:30:34 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: He tried to troll VespertheSnake and failed.
[2/26/12 9:30:36 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Miserably.
[2/26/12 9:30:48 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Is that why he closed his account?
[2/26/12 9:30:59 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Probably.
[2/26/12 9:31:28 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: But hey, one less fail troll, eh?
[2/26/12 9:31:33 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Yeah.
[2/26/12 9:31:42 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Right.

>>186213
[2/26/12 9:31:57 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: BTW, since you look up /cwc/ now, have you checked out any of the other lolcows they talk about on the site?
[2/26/12 9:32:43 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Yep. Nick Bate is even sicker than I am. And at least I'd admit my idiocies, but this guy is a freak!
[2/26/12 9:32:53 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: And don't get me started on Ahuviya.
[2/26/12 9:33:07 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Oh, you check out Nick Bate? Yeah, that guy is fucking digusting.
[2/26/12 9:33:23 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: I barely check up on what ADF is doing nowadays.
[2/26/12 9:33:36 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Damn straight! The guy has a pedo crush on his sister!
[2/26/12 9:33:38 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: ...
[2/26/12 9:33:52 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Konata: Dot. Dot. Dot. Dot.
[2/26/12 9:34:09 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: And these trolls think I'm evil?
[2/26/12 9:34:11 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: His teeth really scare me. How do your teeth end up like that?
[2/26/12 9:34:32 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: At least I brush my teeth from time to time.
[2/26/12 9:34:47 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: And I recall him having a shit fetish?
[2/26/12 9:34:57 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Yes, he does. :-X
[2/26/12 9:35:17 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: And to think, I found Salo in it's entirety on YT last night.
[2/26/12 9:35:33 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Nick would fucking love this movie for The Circle of Shit alone!
[2/26/12 9:35:40 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Oh god...
[2/26/12 9:35:46 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: That guy man...
[2/26/12 9:35:53 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: MANGIA!!!!!
[2/26/12 9:36:19 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Nick would scare the Libertines with his actions.
[2/26/12 9:36:33 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: So, that's who you look up on /cwc/? ADF and Nick Bate?
[2/26/12 9:36:51 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: The Duke (aka Mangia Man) would look at him and go, "And to think, I saw a man fisting another in Caligula!".
[2/26/12 9:36:55 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Just those two.
[2/26/12 9:37:04 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Oh okay.
[2/26/12 9:37:06 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: JustinRPG is too obscure for me.
[2/26/12 9:37:22 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: What amazes me is that /cwc/ has a soft spot for JustinRPG.
[2/26/12 9:37:27 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Really?
[2/26/12 9:38:13 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Yeah. I guess it's because when JustinRPG was on the heels of getting trolled, he went onto /cwc/ and tried to reason with them. He was apparently very calm and cool.
[2/26/12 9:38:42 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Oh? He was like me in that sense?
[2/26/12 9:40:39 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Umm...well, from what I remember, the dude had a scat fetish, believed himself to have married Reshiram from Pokémon, and was a furry.
[2/26/12 9:40:44 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: At least that's what I remember.
[2/26/12 9:40:55 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: I should say "has" not "had"
[2/26/12 9:41:05 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: NVM.
[2/26/12 9:41:11 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Translation: Nevermind.
[2/26/12 9:41:16 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Yeah I got it.
[2/26/12 9:41:19 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: So yeah.
[2/26/12 9:41:53 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Just goes to show that when they think I'm fucked up in the head, there's always another nutjob slithering in the corner.
[2/26/12 9:43:22 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Well dude, let's be realistic. You're a furry, have a MILF fetish, have written self-insert fanfiction, and have favorited some questionable pictures on DeviantArt. That's how the trolls see it.
[2/26/12 9:44:09 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: True. But I don't have a scat fetish.
[2/26/12 9:45:09 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Plus, at least I admit to liking certain things.
[2/26/12 9:46:10 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: And I think I creeped you out. Sorry.
[2/26/12 9:46:13 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Maybe, but still, you favorited a picture of AppleJack and a scarecrow with big breasts.
[2/26/12 9:47:51 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: At least the Applejack in the pic was an anthro. That's all I can think up right now.
[2/26/12 9:48:24 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Don't worry, I know they're not real, unlike Guptill.
[2/26/12 9:48:36 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: ...
[2/26/12 9:48:46 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Should we bail on that point or stay?
[2/26/12 9:49:45 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: I mean, shall we go to a different topic?
[2/26/12 9:50:00 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Yes, let's move on.

>>186214
[2/26/12 9:50:16 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Right. Any high hopes for Wrestlemania?
[2/26/12 9:51:09 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: So far, I'm looking forward to Rock/Cena and Punk/Jericho.
[2/26/12 9:51:21 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Ditto. Sheamus/Bryan?
[2/26/12 9:51:31 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Plus, seeing as how it's strongly hinted that this wil be Undertaker's last WrestleMania, I have to watch that.
[2/26/12 9:51:38 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Sheamus/Bryan is just meh to me.
[2/26/12 9:52:25 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: BTW, I listened to the RawDown Rebound podcast DCE's bro made. They mentioned the fact on how the Hell in a Cell match would happen... in an open arena.
[2/26/12 9:52:40 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: I'm curious about that too.
[2/26/12 9:52:49 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Would you see a helicopter coming in an lowering the structure down?
[2/26/12 9:52:53 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: That would be epic.
[2/26/12 9:53:01 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: That's the only way I can see it happening.
[2/26/12 9:53:09 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: That would be the most awesomest thing in the history of everything!
[2/26/12 9:53:40 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Have it all dark and as the cell is lowering, throw in some flamethrowers and you got a hell of a set-up.
[2/26/12 9:53:55 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Damn straight.
[2/26/12 9:54:15 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: BTW, did you hear the Undertaker cut his hair?
[2/26/12 9:55:27 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Yeah, that's right he did. That's why he was wearing a hood the whole time.
[2/26/12 9:55:50 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Yep. I would be surprised if he's gone Stone Cold on us.
[2/26/12 9:56:55 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: What do you mean?
[2/26/12 9:57:19 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Bald head. Goatee.
[2/26/12 9:57:27 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Possible resemblence?
[2/26/12 9:57:54 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Nah, I think his hair will grow back by the time WrestleMania comes around.
[2/26/12 9:58:06 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Right.
[2/26/12 9:58:29 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Also, what do you think of the Twitter feud between Punk and Chris Brown?
[2/26/12 9:59:56 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: I don't get it. Why would Chris Brown be starting up a feud with Punk?
[2/26/12 10:00:07 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: They're from two opposite backgrounds. It's stupid.
[2/26/12 10:00:27 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Goes to show that Chris Brown pisses off everybody after beating up Rihanna.
[2/26/12 10:01:08 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Yeah.
[2/26/12 10:05:02 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Though I have to admit, it was amusing to hear CM Punk shut down his opposers in his radio interviews.

>>186215
[2/26/12 10:09:47 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Hello?
[2/26/12 10:10:03 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Sorry about that. Computer derped.
[2/26/12 10:10:11 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Oh okay. Damn.
[2/26/12 10:10:30 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Tried watching his Twitter video, but the audio was a bit low.
[2/26/12 10:11:08 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: You mean his direct response to Chris Brown?
[2/26/12 10:11:31 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Yes.
[2/26/12 10:13:46 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Anything else in mind?
[2/26/12 10:13:57 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Actually, there's something I've been curious about.
[2/26/12 10:14:14 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Was it something I did?
[2/26/12 10:14:48 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: It's about ISLAVERDE29
[2/26/12 10:15:03 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Oh? What about him?
[2/26/12 10:17:40 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: I was just curious, he's a misogynist, right?
[2/26/12 10:17:51 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: No. He's not.
[2/26/12 10:18:06 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: He just had some really bad luck with women back in his high school days.
[2/26/12 10:18:25 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: He even complained to me and Ben about his FB friends being a sausage fest.
[2/26/12 10:18:33 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Oh I see.
[2/26/12 10:18:54 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Was it something he did?
[2/26/12 10:19:14 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: No, I'm just looking at the FaceBook groups he liked.
[2/26/12 10:19:31 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: A couple of them are against gay marriage and illegal immigrants.
[2/26/12 10:19:46 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: I know this is a little out of the blue, but this is something that's been on my mind as of late.
[2/26/12 10:20:07 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: I know he hasn't told me about it.
[2/26/12 10:21:25 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Did you know that about him when you became friends with him? I'm not hating on him or anything.
[2/26/12 10:21:28 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Just want to know...
[2/26/12 10:22:00 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Not really. I never thought to ask him.
[2/26/12 10:23:27 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: His views at least. But I have seen his videos prior.
[2/26/12 10:24:12 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Because, and I apologize for being blunt, you get on Chris's case for being a homophobe and being sexist, but then you're friends with Pricey.
[2/26/12 10:24:25 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Again, I know I'm being a bit blunt here.
[2/26/12 10:24:47 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Good point. In my defense, I didn't know about it.
[2/26/12 10:24:52 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Honest.
[2/26/12 10:25:01 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Alright I believe you.
[2/26/12 10:25:10 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Again, not hating on you or Pricey here.
[2/26/12 10:25:28 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Right.
[2/26/12 10:27:41 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Anyway, it's getting late over here. I have class tomorrow, so I better get some sleep.
[2/26/12 10:27:58 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Right. Got a birthday fic to finish.
[2/26/12 10:28:07 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Oh, you're still writing fics?
[2/26/12 10:28:22 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Yep. And yes, I do normal ones as well.
[2/26/12 10:28:40 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Keeps me busy at least.
[2/26/12 10:28:48 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Okay.
[2/26/12 10:28:58 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Anyway, good luck with class.
[2/26/12 10:29:06 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Thanks! Good luck to you!
[2/26/12 10:29:13 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: Ciao.
[2/26/12 10:29:24 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: Later!

  And here is the last leaked Skype call.

In it, A-Log and John talk about about the dang dirty trolls and their wicked schemes, ISLAVERDE29's misogyny and homophobia and A-Log's time as a reporter for WolfDork.com. After declaring himself a 'creative god' the ever modest A-Log vows to continue his fanfics, showing that he truly has learned nothing.

The call closes with A-Log discussing hentai, specifically shota and loli. A-Log claims that he'd never watch such a thing because child porn is illegal in America, seemingly oblivious to the fact that there are screencaps on his ED page that show him browsing and posting in straight shota threads on the WWOEC forums.

And with that, /cwc/, I'll be taking my leave of you for the evening. If anybody seriously wants to read Life in the '80s, I can get around to dropping that sometime tomorrow maybe.

I hope that this cocks has been amusing and interesting for you all and I'd like to thank SpaceScreaminJohn without whom none of this would've been possible.

>>186221
Thanks for everything. You're a pretty cool guy and a bro.

>>186219
>shota and loli. A-Log claims that he'd never watch such a thing because child porn is illegal in America, seemingly oblivious to the fact that there are screencaps on his ED page that show him browsing and posting in straight shota threads on the WWOEC forums.

Out of all of A-Log's conceitedness and apparent ignorance, this is what gets me the most. I just... how can he not see that liking straight shota is at the same level (or, in his world, just as illegal) as liking lolicon? Just because A-Log likes it doesn't suddenly make it better than something A-Log doesn't like. It would be like thinking that shitting in public is OK while peeing in public is not.

>>[2/26/12 10:17:51 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: No. He's not.
>>[2/26/12 10:18:06 PM] Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto: He just had some really bad luck with women back in his high school days.

Pricey fits right in with the loveshy bunch doesn't he?

Here's the drawing ALOG thought was drawn badly in >>186172

>>186219
DAT STUTTERING at the beginning. Bravo to whoever it was that tried to entice him with voice acting work. Today was a good day for A-Log krapplery.

He's actually more like Chris than I ever thought.

I loved him discussing and trying to understand how we're all Krapples. As well as him discussing term limits now that he looked it up on Wikipedia.

Since he'll read this at some point...

HI A-LOG.

>>186226
Is that a drawing by Ryan Slamwheel?

As unlikely as it might be, I'd like to think that the guy offering voice acting work to A-Log was actually a legitimate voice acting talent scout and A-Log, so scared of the trolls, ignored the best chance he might've ever had at getting his dream job.

That'd just be too funny.

>>186219
BEWARE THE MIGHTY KRAPPLE HORDES.

>>186236
ARMED TO THE TEETH WITH HEAT-SEEKING MISSILES.

>>186232
It is.

>>186238
I honestly think A-Log is almost more deluded than Chris when it comes to "trolls", what they do, and what they have in mind for him.

>>186228 here and you're right >>186233 that'd be the ultimate trolling. It's so much better that way.

>>186119
>>186138

I really wish people would learn what troll-shielding is instead of just falling back on it as a casual insult. It isn't trying to troll others while being flawed; it's being afraid of getting trolled and trying to fit in with them by trolling others in order to avert trolling.

>>186167

Soul-searching? Self-reflection? Your future?

I think you might be taking inconsequential internet drama too seriously.

>>186246
>it's being afraid of getting trolled and trying to fit in with them by trolling others in order to avert trolling.

...And does that not seem to be exactly what is going on? For as much shit as A-Log gets, it is only natural for his internet buddies to assume that they will be future targets unless they become viewed as bringers of information or A-Log traitors.

But whatever. I actually found some of this cocks to be humorous so far.

As someone that is mildly awtistic I'd love to see A-Log explain this "Chris makes awtistic people look bad" shit.

Think you can make this shit happen, John?

>>186213
>[2/26/12 9:29:24 PM] John Quinteros Jr.: ALogIsAHuegkrapple, TerranceBogard, and GreggMays64 are having a lot of fun pissing off the cheese conies in the comments.

I love those coffee filters!

This thread delivered!

>>186210

Why is LilyLivers blaming 789chan for hacking wingerdinger? Wingerdinger was hacked back in mid 2010. Long before we had discovered A-Log. Did they bring back wingerdinger? And if they did, how do they know one of us hacked it after they brought it back?

>>186297
Actually, I think /cwc/ has been aware of A-Log for quite some time. The organized trolling of him, the "HI A-LOG!" meme and his induction into 'the lolcow hall of shame' is a fairly recent development, but A-Log has been known to 789chan for a good while.

Given how his Chris-chan standup was posted here back when it originally happened and the massive outpouring of hatred it recieved, it's not unlikely that he has been trolled before, just not on the scale he is today.

A-Logs friends are clearly just giving us shit on him so we'll go easier on them, that much is fact. however, they for the most part aren't terribly interesting and do tend to deliver some pretty ween shit, so I couldn't care less really.

I wonder how A-log feels, or knows about these being released?

>>186400
A-Log definitely knows. John apparently told him on Facebook last night. I note that John is no longer listed among A-Log's Facebook friends.

So, how long 'til A-Log gets his own wiki? A-Logipedia or some shit?

Say John, since you're no longer friends with A-log, why you don't wanna be friends anymore?

>>186421
Do you really have to ask?

>>Soul-searching? Self-reflection? Your future? I think you might be taking inconsequential internet drama too seriously.

*laughs* I probably am, but I'm still going to take GeorgieBoy9998's advice, close up shop on YouTube, and lay low for a while. I think it would be best.

Any chance for a Q&A from that super retarded homosexual deviant dick lover Pikachu0?

OP better post that Life In The '80s script or i'm gonna ban his ass.

>>186547
I bet it is completely free of Mary Sues. I mean you know there won't be some fat neckbeard hooking up with wide hipped, big butted, well-endowed women in their late 30's to early 50's who just so happen to look like mothers from various modern cartoons.

>>186306

>so we'll go easier on him

How can you get easier than the babby-mode trolling favored on /cwc/?

>>186547
Oh, alright, Homor, if you insist. Brace yourselves /cwc/, we've a long night ahead of us...

Life in the 80's

Episode 1: Escape to Party Paradise (Pilot)

written by Anthony LoGatto


Script Written: 6-24-03
Script Completed: 8-3-03


(opening teaser)

Narrator: Tonight, on the premiere of Life in the 80's... (first scene shows Jamie and his friends trying to figure out a way to get to Lucien's party) Will Jamie and his cool crew get into Lucien Plumtree III's "Back to School Bash?" (second scene shows Jamie alone with Veronica) Will Jamie get his first kiss from Veronica Baltimore? (last scene shows the vice principal, Ariel Sopus plotting an idea to get information on the students) And will Ariel Sopus have a chance to get more from her students? I'd tell you, but I wouldn't spoil a thing. Besides, this is a parody of teen dramas like that Dawson's Creek, but this is done 80's style, baby! This show is rad to the max!

(cue opening and the accompanying theme song. It shows our main characters posing for the camera as their names appear on the screen.)

(Fade out to the streets of Staten Island, New York. As we can see, this is pure suburbia for the Borough of Parks. We then see two teenage boys walking to school. The first boy is an average looking boy who wears a green shirt w/ a black stripe on the front and sleeves, blue jeans, and black hi-tops, has brown hair and wears glasses. His companion is also an average size boy wearing a white shirt under a green jacket, green jeans, red hi-tops, has blonde hair done similar to Joey Wheeler of Yu-Gi-Oh and has a New York accent. Both are excited about the new school year. They are Jamie Willis and Phil Tuesday, respectively)

Phil: Oh, man! It's so great to be back to school!

Jamie: But I thought you hated school, Phil.

Phil: Not anymore, Jamie. I'm just happy that in two more years, we'll be home free!

Jamie: Yeah, me too. Besides, I hope this year's seniors are not as pushy as last year's.

(as they keep walking, they meet two girls. The first girl has short, brunette hair done like Yu-Gi-Oh's Téa Gardner, hazel eyes, and wears a white blouse under a gray vest, blue skirt and brown boots. The second girl is wearing an outfit that has a similar style to Strawberry Shortcake, from the red dress to the matching green striped socks and yellow marijane shoes. The cute brunette is Samantha McAdam, and the Strawberry Shortcake obsessed girl is Susie Taylor, better known to her friends as Strawberry Sue.)

Strawberry Sue: (notices Jamie and Phil) (overjoyed) Jamie! Phil! (comes over to hug them) It's great to see you guys again!

Phil: Yeah, it's nice to see you too, Strawberry Sue.

Jamie: (to Samantha) So Samantha, how was summer camp?

Samantha: Well, you know, I was roughing it and avoiding mosquito bites as possible. But during the summer, there has been something that I've had hidden in my heart for a while now, and-

Jamie: Can you tell me later? We have to wait for Teshawn, Jade and Shades to come with us.

Phil: (points to something off-screen) Well, here's an answer to where we can find Teshawn and Jade.

(the scene switches to two black kids, one male, one female, standing by a boom box playing a rap song. The first black kid is wearing a leather jacket, ADIDAS without the laces, a black backwards baseball cap, and dresses like Run DMC. He is doing some break dancing moves near his boom box. The black girl wearing a purple shirt with the words "Valley Girl", blue jeans, and white sneakers with the yellow Day-Glo socks. Her hair is done in the mushroom style of Tootie from The Facts of Life. The rap-obsessed boy is Teshawn Jones, and the black Valley Girl is Jade Althazar.)

Jamie: (approaches Teshawn and Jade) Hey guys.

Teshawn: (stops break dancing) Jamie! What's up, my homie! (shakes his hand and pats him on the back) How's it going, man?

Jamie: Goin' swell. (to Jade) How about you, Jade?

Jade: Well, it's been, like, a cruel summer for me, for sure.

Strawberry Sue: How bad was it?

Jade: Are you kidding? Like, I went to Miami for the summer, and the heat was, like, out of sight.

Samantha: Tell me about it.

Jamie: Well, I guess all we need to do now is wait for Shades.

(on cue, a teenage boy rides on by on a motorcycle. He then stops near Jamie and the others. The boy's motorcycle is a jet black Yamaha. He is wearing a white leather jacket, black jean pants, and black motorcycle boots. He then takes his helmet off, to reveal that he has jet black hair done in a pompadour w/ sunglasses. This is Jimmy Chiodo, also known as Shades to his friends.)

Shades: Did somebody call for me?

Phil: Hey, Shades! What's up, man? (gives Shades a five)

Shades: Nothin' much. Just cruisin' around Staten Island on my wheels.

Samantha: Aren't you going to come to school with us, Shades?

Shades: Of course I am! (puts his helmet back on) I'll just meet you guys there. (gets back on his motorcycle, revs up the motor and speeds off)

Strawberry Sue: (excited as ever) Well, come on guys! What are we waiting for? (she runs off ahead of the pack with Jamie, Phil, Samantha, Teshawn and Jade following.)

(switch to their school, Tottenville High School, as we see many students enter the building, talking amongst themselves. As we see two girls passing by, the camera focuses on two teen males. The first one is dressed in a mix of preppie and yuppie, sports straight brunette hair and has a snobbish, yet spoiled demeanor. He is mentioning one of the girls to his friend, who is also dressed as a preppie. The first yuppie snob is Lucien Plumtree III.)

Lucien III: (mentioning one of the girls) I've managed to reduce her fee. If you know what I mean!

Preppie Kid: (laughs) Boo-yah, old friend! Boo-yah indeed!

(switch to another pair of girls; this time, it's twins. They both have black hair, but the only difference is that they're wearing separate clothes and different hairstyles. The first twin has on a blue jacket and skirt with her hair having a circle loop on her left side. The other twin has a red jacket and skirt with her hair also in a loop, but on the right side.)

Twin #2: So Mei, what has mom made for our lunch?

Mei (Twin #1): Mom has made me sushi. How about you, Lei?

Lei (Twin #2): I got some pork-fried rice, orange juice in a thermos and mom's breast enlargement pills.

Mei: (confused) Why did you need those pills for?

Lei: (pops one into her mouth) Well it's for the boys, duh. (drinks her orange juice and swallows the pill) Mom wants us to look our best. (all of a sudden, her breasts get a little larger along with a 'pop' sound from each one. Mei, her sister, couldn't help but laugh. Switch to Jamie, Phil and Samantha, who just saw the twins as they pass by)

Jamie: Man, one of the Hirochan Twins is letting herself go!

(switch to the hallway, where we see two officials of the school greeting their students. The first one is a stout man with a British accent, with short brown hair, a mustache, and wears a blue dress shirt with a red cashmere sweater on top of it, black slacks and brown shoes. The second official is a stunningly beautiful woman with long brown hair, a bust size of 44DD, and wearing a purple work woman's uniform and high heels. The man is Principal Graham Gilliam, and the woman is Ariel Sopus, the vice principal.)

Student #1: (passes by Graham and Ariel) Hiya, Principal Gilliam!

Principal Gilliam: Good morning, Roxbury.

>>186661
Student #2: (passes by Graham and Ariel) Hey, Principal Gilliam!

Principal Gilliam: Hello.

Student #3: (passes by Graham and Ariel) Great to be back, sir!

Principal Gilliam: I know.

(Ariel is getting a little too annoyed that the students are not paying attention to her)

Vice Principal Sopus: Mr. Gilliam, with all due respect, why are the students saying "hi" to you instead of me?

Principal Gilliam: Well, it comes from being lenient towards the students, Miss Sopus. What's wrong? Aren't you getting enough attention from the students since you first came here?

(at that moment, one of the more geekier students, the types that don't hang around with the cool kids or have any outside contact, comes up to Ariel.)

Geeky Student: (raspy) Hiya Mrs. Sopus. (huffs and wheezes as he talks) Can you... put me... in... detention... more often? Hm? (smiles widely)

(being annoyed, Ariel calmly rises a fist and backhands the creepy student, and knocks him to the floor.)

Vice Principal Sopus: (to herself/annoyed) Why must I have to contend with all these creeps trying to get a date from me? I'm married, dammit!

(switch to another section of the hallway, where we see Jamie, Phil and Samantha hanging out near the trophy case)

Samantha: So guys, who do you think our teacher is going to be this year?

Jamie: I just hope this teacher is more lenient than last year. Man, he must've been a drill sergeant before coming to the school.

Phil: Aw, who cares what the teacher's gonna be like! All I know, that this year, is going to be the year of the Tuesday!

Jamie: Phil, as a bud, I can understand that, but a gag-filled school-year isn't gonna- *gasps*

(Jamie cuts himself off from Phil and Samantha as he sees a beautiful female student nearby. She has long, raven black hair, a beautiful complexion, red lips from her lipstick, a bust size of 38C, and wears a chartreuse mini dress under a red dress jacket, purple earrings, purple fingernails, and black high-heels. This is Veronica Baltimore, richest and most beautiful woman of Tottenville High. She is just getting her things from her locker when she notices Jamie.)

Jamie: (off-screen) [mesmerized] It's her...

Phil: (off-screen) Who? Veronica Baltimore?

Samantha: (off-screen) [scoffs] Veronica? Pfeh! What the hell makes her so damn great, (under her breath) that slutty little snob!

Phil: (off-screen) Well, she is rich, after all.

(Veronica then smiles. She then leaves her locker and walks over to Jamie and his friends.)

Jamie: (to himself) <Oh my God! She's coming this way! Remember Jamie: just stay calm and act cool.> (places his hand on the trophy case and puts his other hand up as if he's pointing to Veronica) <Perfect.>

Veronica: Hey, Jamie. It's so cool to see you again this year.

(Jamie, who is trying to act cool, is too nervous to say anything, but is able to keep his hand on the trophy case. Suddenly, his arm breaks through the trophy case; a hint of blood spurting out of his arm)

Samantha: Um... Jamie, your arm's bleeding.

Jamie: (lowly) Not now.

Samantha: (nonchalant) *sigh* (walks away) I'll be waiting for you by the gauze.

Phil: (to Veronica) Hey, Ronnie. It's me, your old pal, Phil Tuesday. (silence) You know, that weird kid from elementary? (silence) I gave you one of my kidneys, remember? (lifts up his shirt to reveal a scar on his abdomen)

(switch to Phil's insides, where we see one kidney looking at where the other kidney used to be, as noted by the dotted lines.)

Kidney: I miss him.

(switch back to Phil and Veronica. Phil is getting serious now, as Veronica still can't remember him)

Phil: (serious) Come on, don't you even remember me? (eyes dilate) I mean... I remember that sleep-over we had, but it ended early before Sunday when you told your parents that I might affect your image?

Veronica: ...Bill?

Phil: (corrects her on his name) It's Phil.

Veronica: Oh, right. Well... nice meeting you again, Phil. (to Jamie) And it's a pleasure seeing you, Jamie. (walks off. When she's gone, Jamie finally speaks)

Jamie: (oblivious that his arm's bleeding and that Veronica already left) Hi, Veronica. Yes, it's nice to see you too.

>>186662
(switch to another part of the halls, where we see a bully standing by the lockers. This bully is 5'7", wears a black leather jacket, black jeans, black boots, and sports greasy black hair. This is Snake Slither. He is called "Snake" because, well, he sounds like one. He is scoping out any sorry sap to beat up.)

Snake: Another day, another wussy to pummel. I just have to find the right one, and- (cuts himself off, as he sees a kid dressed in a brown trench coat, with blue jeans, red polo shirt, red sneakers, and a brown British cap) Aha! Perfect prey.

(Snake rubs his hands together as he approaches the kid. Pan to Shades, Teshawn and Jade at their lockers when they spot Snake.)

Jade: Hey, like, isn't that Snake Slither?

Teshawn: Who? That fool?

Shades: Looks like he's up to his old tricks again.

Teshawn: Huh? (sees Snake going towards the kid) Oh, man. Not again!

Jade: That is so totally wrong. I mean, for sure Snake has some issues, but he can't, like, take it out on others.

Shades: Come on, guys. Let's remind Snake about what he has to do around here.

(Teshawn and Jade nod in agreement and they follow Shades. Switch to the kid, as he gets something in his locker. When he closes the locker, he is greeted by Snake, smiling deviously at this poor sap)

Snake: So, kid. New around here?

Kid: (nervous) [speaks in a Russian accent] Da. But I've been a resident of Staten Island since I was five. I'm just new to the school.

Snake: (suspicious) Oh, a Red, eh?

Kid: Huh? Oh, no. I don't represent Communism. That's the reason my family and I moved to America.

Snake: (not believing what he said) You know, both our countries are in the Cold War, so since you are new here, I'm going to have double of your lunch money. (brings his hand out, and opens it, waiting for the Russian kid to pay up)

Kid: What? I'm sorry but you can't have my lunch money. Now, if you'll excuse me,- (gets cut off as Snake grabs him by the collar and places him against the lockers)

Snake: (teed off) Listen, Soviet punk! I expect your ass to give me some money, and you cut off my line?! I'm giving you 'til the count of three to cough up the dough or else I'm gonna pound your a-s-s back into the USSR! One, (the kid closes his eyes) two, (rears back his left fist) thr- (gets cut off as he feels his fist not moving. He turns around to see that Shades is holding on to Snake's fist, just saving the Russian kid's life.)

Shades: Well, well ... we meet again, Snake.

Snake: (shocked) Shades Chiodo? (smiles wickedly) Well, who do I expect to protect these poor saps?

Shades: Me. And if you don't like it Snake, then take up with all of us!

Teshawn: Yeah, you can never mess with a brother. Especially a brother like Teshawn Jones.

Snake: Yeah, yeah, cut the superhero crap. (walks away) We'll meet again, Shades. And that goes double for Jamie and Phil. (to himself) Damn three strikes rule.

(as Shades, Teshawn and Jade watch Snake leave, the Russian kid just looks at them silently. He then goes up to them)

Kid: Um, excuse me.

Jade: Yeah, kid?

Kid: Um, I would like to thank you for saving me from that brute.

Shades: Hey, don't mention it.

Kid: My name is Nikolai Klutznick. But you may call me Nick. I'm an inventor and a science whiz.

Teshawn: Really? Well, I'm sure glad you came here, comrade. We do need someone for the science fairs.

Shades: Do you usually get treated that way because of where you came from?

Nick: Well, actually I...

>>186664
(switch to a classroom, where we see many students, including Jamie and his friends, Lucien and Veronica, talking amongst themselves. We then switch to the classroom door, when it opens and a teacher walks in. This is a male teacher in late 40's-early 50's, has graying white hair, a blue with red striped dress shirt, and black pants w/ black loafers. He then quiets the class down and begins to introduce himself.)

Teacher: Settle down, class. Settle down. (the class settles down) Now for those of you who didn't have me in Math last year, my name is (writes his name on the chalkboard) Mr. William Gooseberg. I repeat, some of you I've had as homeroom students, some of you I've only had in Math class. But I hope we, as a class, can make it through 1986 as a well oiled machine. I also have some announcements to make. (to an unseen student) Can you stand up, please? (the student then walks up into the front of the class. As he gets to the front, we see the new student is Nikolai Klutznick) Class, I would like for you all to meet Nikolai Klutznick. He is going to be in our sophomore class this year. (to Nick) Tell us a little about yourself, Mr. Klutznick.

Nick: Thanks, Mr. Gooseberg. My name is Nikolai Klutznick, but you may call me Nick. I was born in Soviet Russia, but my family and I have moved to America since I was five, and I've been living in Staten Island ever since. I'm also a technological whiz, so if you all are interested, I-

Lucien III: (interrupts Nick mid-sentence) Shut your pie-hole, Commie!

Nick: Excuse me?

Lucien III: I have an announcement to make.

Nick: But I wasn't-

Lucien III: Boring!

Nick: I'm sorry, but if you-

Lucien III: Boring!

Nick: But-

Lucien III: Boring!

Nick: (annoyed) Argh! (walks back to his seat)

Lucien III: Anyway, I, Lucien Plumtree III, am having a spectacular "Back to School" party, and only some of you are going to be invited. Of course, anybody who is anybody in Tottenville High will be coming, except for the following: (camera takes a shot of Shades) greaser freak, James Chiodo; (switch to Teshawn) Grandmaster Flash wannabe, Teshawn Jones; (switch to Jade) Valley freak, Jade Althazar; (switch to Strawberry Sue) that little strawberry, Cabbage Patch obsessed Strawberry Sue; (switch to Samantha) goodie-goodie, Samantha McAdam; (switch to Phil) that degenerate geek, Phil Tuesday...

Phil: (irate) Hey, who you calling a geek, snob boy?!

Lucien III: (finishes his "Not Invited" portion as the camera switches to Jamie, drawing a doodle on his paper) And of course, Jamie Willis. (Jamie stops drawing) He doesn't even deserve to get in; nor having Veronica like I do.

Jamie: (gets up from his desk) Oh, come on! I know you and Veronica are going out, but soon she'll see who has real heart in this school.

Lucien III: Oh, please. As your friend Jade would say, "Like, gag me with a spoon!" (cut to Jade, face turning red and steaming mad as Lucien stole one of her Valley Girl lines. Cut back to Lucien and Jamie) Veronica is as rich as I am, so we all know that money is what's important in love and war. (looks over to Veronica, who is blowing a kiss at him. Lucien does the same to Veronica as Jamie rolls his eyes in annoyance. Samantha remains quiet in thought about Jamie and him loving Veronica. Switch to Mr. Gooseberg, who is trying to keep this class in order)

Mr. Gooseberg: Okay, Mr. Plumtree. You and Jamie have made your points about this party. You know, the two of you would be great for the debate team. Now please get back to your seats so we can get class started.

Lucien III: Yes, Mr. Gooseberg. (looks over to Nick) And if you're asking, you're not invited as well. (walks back to his desk, leaving Nick unhappy)

Jamie: (to himself) <Great! I thought this year was going to be great, but Lucien's in my class. I've got to get into that party no matter what the cost!> (as he eyes Veronica) <Soon, Veronica. Soon, we'll be together at Lucien's party. Problem is, how am I going to pull it off?>

(Commercial Break)

(open in at the principal's office where we see Principal Gilliam and Vice Principal Sopus are having a meeting with the superintendent via the view screen. This superintendent is a little young for his age, being in his thirties and all. He has gray hair and dark skin and is wearing a suit. This is Charles LaTour, the superintendent for the Staten Island district.)

Superintendent LaTour: Morning, Gilliam. Morning, Sopus.

Principal Gilliam & Vice Principal Sopus: (in unison) Morning, Superintendent LaTour.

Superintendent LaTour: Well, I suppose that we are getting off on the right foot for the school year at Tottenville. The Board of Ed. has hired me to keep an eye out for anything wrong in this school.

Principal Gilliam: You don't need to worry, Mr. LaTour. All of our students have been well behaved in their academics.

Vice Principal Sopus: We just have to work on student behavior. I mean, our main annoyances at this school are Philip Tuesday, James Chiodo, Sanford Slither, and Jamie Willis.

Superintendent LaTour: But isn't Mr. Willis a good student?

Vice Principal Sopus: Well, he does hang out with Tuesday and Chiodo.

Principal Gilliam: Well, just because Jamie hangs out with Mr. Tuesday and Mr. Chiodo doesn't mean he's a bad egg.

Vice Principal Sopus: But good apples go rotten. Haven't you learned anything in your years as principal?

(as they speak, Superintendent LaTour darts his eyes across at Gilliam and then at Sopus. He gets confused, then starts to speak)

Superintendent LaTour: (clears his throat) Mind if I make a suggestion?

Principal Gilliam: (turns to the screen) Of course not.

Superintendent LaTour: Why don't you just find a way to get into the students' heads?

(Ariel frowns upon this at first, but seconds later, she gives out a devious smile)

Vice Principal Sopus: That's a very good idea. But how are we going to mingle with them as we get into their heads?

Principal Gilliam: Don't you mean 'where'?

(just at that moment, Lucien's voice can be heard on the loudspeaker)

Lucien III: (on PA) Attention all students! Everybody who is everybody will be invited to my "Back to School Bash" at my mansion tonight! (pause) That is all!

(Ariel grows an even more devious smile than before after the announcement from Lucien)

>>186665
(switch to Jamie's house, living room. Jamie and his friends are sitting around, unhappy that Lucien has not invited them to his party.)

Strawberry Sue: God, I can't believe we're not invited to Lucien's party!

Teshawn: Yeah, that's pretty whack for that jive turkey not to invite us to begin with.

Phil: Yeah, that jerk still owes me twenty bucks!

Jamie: (confused) When did that happen?

Phil: We had a bet on who can win last January's Super Bowl.

Jamie: San Francisco 49ers?

Phil: Bingo! (he and Jamie give each other a high five)

Samantha: Look, why are we moping around worrying about Lucien's party? He never accepts us anyway.

Jade: Sam's, like, got a point. Lucien has totally disliked anybody lower than him.

Strawberry Sue: But I love parties!

Jade: (to Strawberry Sue) Oh please! You, like, have tea parties with Cabbage Patch Kids and you're fifteen!

Strawberry Sue: (defensive) At least I got mine before they sold out!

Jamie: (calms the two girls down) Take it easy guys! Fighting can't solve our dilemma. I like to go to that party just like you guys, but I just want Veronica Baltimore to notice me.

Samantha: Her? Jamie, she's no good! She's practically a spoiled slut who takes advantages of guys like you!

Strawberry Sue: Yes, she has a point.

Jamie: So what? I know that deep down, inside her heart, beats a beautiful beat of beauty. And I want to find out for myself... heart surgery not included.

Samantha: (in thought) Damn! So close!

Shades: Hey! (all eyes go towards Shades, who is laying down on the couch) I got an idea. Why don't we just crash the party? Just because we're not invited doesn't mean we can't have fun. What's the cost? What harm would it do?

Phil: You know, Shades man has a point!

Teshawn: Yeah. We can just crash the rich boy's casbah.

Strawberry Sue: (with stars in her eyes) I can finally mingle with popular kids!

Jamie: I don't know guys. Isn't crashing a party an aux paux of biblical proportions?

Phil: Jamie, you want Veronica to notice you, right?

Jamie: Right.

Phil: So crashing the party is a good thing, eh Jamie boy?

(Jamie has a minute to think about this. Then...)

Jamie: Sure. Why the hell not!

Phil: Alright! We're rockin' the casbah!

(the gang lets out a cheer except for Samantha, who is still thinking about Jamie.)

(as they cheer, we then see Jamie's father come into the room. He is in his mid 30's to early 40's, has gray hair, a goatee, and wears a white dress shirt with a red cashmere sweater over it, black pants and brown loafers. He is smoking a pipe. This is Eric Willis, Jamie's father.)

Mr. Willis: I heard a joyous refrain. What's the occasion?

Jamie: Oh, hi dad. Me and my friends were just talking about a party that Lucien didn't want us to go.

Mr. Willis: (takes his pipe off his mouth and holds it in his hand) Do you mean that rich Plumtree kid you kids go to school with?

Strawberry Sue: Yeah, Mr. Willis; the third Lucien in the family.

(on cue, Jamie's mother walks into the living room. Jamie's mother is in also in her late 30's, wears a red turtleneck shirt w/ a pearl necklace, gold earrings, brown mini-skirt, and red high-heels, and has long, flowing brown hair. Her looks come from the late wrestling manager, Miss Elizabeth. This is Abigail Willis, Jamie's mother.)

Mrs. Willis: Did that Lucien boy reject you kids again?

Jamie: Yes, mom.

Mrs. Willis: Son, I know you and your friends are trying to become popular, but you don't need Lucien and his party as a meal ticket.

Mr. Willis: Besides, his father was a rival of mine back in my high school days.

Phil: Yeah, that as it may be, Mr. Willis. But your son's in love.

Mr. Willis: (takes a puff from his pipe) In love? With who?

Samantha: (w/ contempt) That spoiled slut, Veronica Baltimore.

Mrs. Willis: Now you quit that, young lady! Sure, Veronica has gotten some perks that make her that way, but she may be the one Jamie is looking for.

Samantha: I know she's got perks. But look at me. (bats her eyelashes at Mr. and Mrs. Willis)

Mr. Willis: I do find you cute, but not cute enough for Jamie here.

Mrs. Willis: What were you kids talking about?

Jade: Lucien's party. Like, didn't your son totally tell you that already? For sure.

Mrs. Willis: (embarrassed w/ sweat drop on forehead) Oh, right. (laughs nervously)

Mr. Willis: What were you kids planning on, anyway?

Jamie: Huh? (becomes nervous) Oh, uh, well, it's not that important to tell. But you see-

???: Jamie and his friends are planning to crash that rich kid's party.

(Jamie and the others look, via a whip pan, to see Jamie's little brother, Sammy. Sammy is near 10 years old, has short blonde hair, wears a black with a green stripe shirt, blue jeans, and white Reeboks. He is sitting by the TV playing with an Atari 2600 as they were having this conversation)

Jamie: (angry) You little snitch!

Shades: How did that little runt hear our conversation?

Sammy: Hey, just because I'm Jamie's little bro, doesn't mean I get sassed around here. I sass others, not on me.

(whip pan to Jamie and his friends as their faces turn red in anger and a temperature valve appears on the lower right side of the screen. As they turn red, the temperature goes up really fast, and breaks when it reaches the top. Whip pan back to Eric and Abigail Willis.)

Mrs. Willis: You know Jamie, normally your father and I would scold you and your friends about doing something like crashing a party, ...

Phil: (eyes Sammy suspiciously) We know how that happens.

Mrs. Willis: But we actually don't mind.

Jamie: Really?

Sammy: (shocked) What?!

Mr. Willis: Of course we don't. Your mother and I had also been rejected; at that time it was Lucien Plumtree, Jr.'s party we were rejected. We also had a similar tactic to get in, but we weren't lucky.

(flashback to 20 years, around the time Eric and Abigail were teenagers. It takes place at a big mansion, where the host is at the gate checking the guests to see who's invited or not. This host looks a lot like Lucien, basically making him Lucien's dad, Lucien, Jr. As he goes through the guests, he then sees two casually dressed people come by. He stops them.)

Lucien, Jr.: Hold it. What's your name?

Man: My name is Ronald Doonesbury, and this is my girlfriend, Selma.

(Lucien, Jr. narrows his eyes together. Suddenly, he grabs for their hair, and rips them off. As it turns out, they're wigs, and the couple is none other than Eric and Abigail.)

Lucien, Jr.: A-ha! Nice try, you two commoners. But that trick won't work on me!

Eric: Come on, Lucien! You've got to let us in!

Abigail: Yeah! You cannot just let only rich people in!

Lucien, Jr.: Why the hell not?!

Abigail: Because the rich cannot be the ones that get to control the world, and let all the people be controlled by the ones who buy the government,-

Lucien, Jr.: (as Abigail is talking) Oh, [CENSORED] this. Security!

>>186666
(cut to outside Lucien, Jr.'s mansion, as Eric and Abigail get kicked out, landing on their rear-ends. End flashback as we ripple back to the Willis home, living room.)

Strawberry Sue: Gee, I never knew Lucien's dad was that cruel.

Phil: Well Sue, it runs in the family. Like father, like son.

Shades: Yeah, in the case of being a complete asshole.

Jade: Like, on God's green Earth!

Teshawn: Preach it, sister!

Mr. Willis: I have to agree with you on this one, kids. (takes another puff from his pipe) But if you want to crash Lucien's party, undetected and not found out, you need to come up with a plan.

Jamie: I know, dad. But we need a perfect plan so that we cannot be discovered.

(on cue, there's a knock on the door)

Mrs. Willis: I'll get it.

(Abigail gets up and walks towards the door. When she opens the door, we see that Nikolai Klutznick is outside.)

Nick: Hello. Is this the residence of Jamie Willis?

Mrs. Willis: Why, yes it is. (by this point, Jamie and his friends go towards the door themselves) I'm his mother, Abigail. Jamie is with his friends, and he-

Shades: (recognizes Nick) Hey, it's that Russian kid me, Jade and Teshawn saved from Snake.

Nick: (notices Shades) Shades? You are friends with Jamie Willis?

Jamie: Yes. Yes he is. I think you might have already known Shades, Jade and Teshawn. I'm Jamie, the one you're looking for. (gestures to Phil, Samantha and Strawberry Sue) These are my friends Phil Tuesday, Samantha McAdam and Sue Taylor, but we just call her Strawberry Sue.

Phil/Samantha/Strawberry Sue: (ad-libed) 'Sup/Hello/Hi!

Nick: Oh. It's nice to meet you all. I was just in the neighborhood, and just happened to hear your conversation about Lucien's party.

Samantha: (surprised) How did you hear us from outside?

Nick: Simple. (takes out a device from his trench coat pocket. It looks like a small satellite dish shaped like a hearing aid) With this device, I can hear from many city blocks. As you may forget, I am a gadget whiz kid.

Phil: Oh, I guess we forgot about that.

Strawberry Sue: Can you make me a device that can make my Strawberry Shortcake and Cabbage Patch Kids dolls come to life?

Nick: (unsure) Ummmmm... I'm not sure about that. (changes the subject) But I do know a way to get into Lucien's party.

Jamie: Really? Can you give us the details?

Nick: (nods his head) Da.

(switch to Lucien's mansion, backyard. As we can see, the caterers and other party planners are setting up the party in Lucien III's backyard. Lucien is in charge of the party and is seen checking out the plans as they set up the party.)

Lucien III: (bossy) Come on, people. Move it! This party is supposed to start around seven o'clock sharp, not seven o'two! (to one off-screen party decorator) Hey, move it with those balloons! I want this to be an extravaganza for the students! (to an off-screen caterer) You! I want all the wine-coolers to be set upon the table near the punch bowl, tout suite! (he then notices an error as he eyes another decorator) What the?! (walks over to the decorator, who is standing by a mahogany table with metal chairs) What the hell is this?!

Decorator: What's wrong, Mr. Plumtree?

Lucien III: (irate) What's wrong? WHAT'S WRONG?! I ordered a Maplewood table, not mahogany!

Decorator: (getting nervous) I-I-I'm sorry, Mr. Plumtree. That's the only one they had in the shop.

Lucien III: SNAKE!!!!

(at his beck and call, Snake Slither appears next to Lucien)

Snake: Yeah, Lucien?

Lucien III: Take away this commoner, and do what you want to this poor sap.

Snake: (punches his fist into his hand) Will do, boss. (snickers) Will do.

(Snake then grabs the decorator by the back of his collar and drags him away from Lucien.)

Decorator: (fearing for his life) No! Anything but that, Mr. Plumtree! No! No! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(as the decorator is dragged away, Veronica, Lucien's main squeeze, comes up to him.)

Veronica: Lucien, darling. Don't you think giving that decorator to Snake is a little too much?

Lucien III: Hmm, you're right. I should have cut off his credit card.

Veronica: (giggles evilly) Perfect. But are you sure you don't want Jamie and his friends to come to the party tonight?

Lucien III: Why should I? Jamie and his friends are all commoners, and what's the point of bringing the poor to a high-school extravaganza such as this?

Veronica: Lucien, this party isn't the only social event in high-school. There's the prom, the homecoming dance, the Sadie Hawkins Dance, the Halloween ball, the Christmas Dance, the numerous sporting events against Wagner, the cheerleading competition, not to mention-

Lucien III: Damn! There's a lot of events in high school! But you do have a point.

Veronica: I do?

Lucien III: Yes, there are many social events Tottenville High has to offer. Which means, as long as you're in charge of the Student Council, we can keep Jamie and his friends out of every one!

Veronica: (lovingly) Oh, Lucien... (hugs Lucien tightly, and rubs her nose on his nose. As they embrace, Snake comes back with the battered and bloodied decorator)

Snake: Hey Lucien, what should I do with this guy?

Lucien III: (points to an unseen area as he rubs noses w/ Veronica) Throw him onto that pile over there.

(Snake does as he is ordered to, and walks over to the pile. As we see him walking there, we see that the pile is made up of other decorators and party planners who didn't make Lucien III happy. Snake throws the decorator onto the pile and walks off.)

>>186668
(switch to the Sopus home. Camera stays focused on Ariel's room as she searches for something to wear for her plan.)

Vice Principal Sopus: Hmmm, let's see if I have some clothes so me and Mr. Gilliam can mingle with the students at Lucien's party. (goes into her closet and searches for the perfect disguise) It has to be what today's kids are wearing. Luckily for me I have some of those Day-Glo socks. (finally picks the one she wants. She smiles happily.) Perfect choice.

(switch to Mr. Gilliam's home, which looks like a British mansion. Cut to his room, where he currently looking for an outfit himself. He points to one, but shakes his head and looks again.)

(cut back to Lucien's mansion. As we can see, the party is at full swing. Lucien III is mingling and greeting the guests as they enter. Switch to outside the mansion where we see a catering truck come to a stop across the mansion. The lettering on the sides of the truck read "Pilaf Catering Services". We then see three people exit the truck. They look very familiar. In fact, the three caterers are actually Jamie, Phil and Samantha. Jamie turns back to whoever's in the truck.)

Jamie: Nick, are you sure we're gonna pull this off?

Nick: (pops his head into view) Trust me. My father is friends with the caterers to this party so he's given us this truck to rent.

Samantha: But these waiter outfits seem too French!

Nick: Sorry about that, Sam. It's the company's uniform.

Jamie: But what about Shades, Jade and Teshawn?

Jade: (pops her head out of the truck) Like, don't worry, guys. Me and Nick will watch your moves and watch what happens at the party. When you guys, like, get caught, Shades and Teshawn will help you escape.

Phil: Thanks, Jade.

Nick: (closes the doors) Good luck, guys.

(after Nick closes the door, Jamie, Phil and Samantha get their food carts and push them towards the mansion)

Jamie: Do you guys think this'll work?

Phil: No sweat, Jamie. Nick says this plan is fool-proof.

Samantha: But what if Lucien finds out about us crashing his party?

Phil: Relax, Sam. Like Valley Girl said, Shades and Teshawn are working on a way to help us out.

Jamie: Well, for once, I hope you're right.

Samantha: (notices something's not quite right) Hey. Aren't we missing somebody?

(on cue, Strawberry Sue runs over, pushing a dessert cart, and wearing the same catering uniform as the others, only she is still wearing her Strawberry Shortcake-esqe hat)

Strawberry Sue: (catching her breath) Sorry I'm late guys. I had to explain to my mom and dad why I had to come with you guys; I told them we were baking a cake at Sam's house. (then notices her friends looking at her) What?

Samantha: That hat. Do you actually think you'll make it if Lucien knows it's us?

Strawberry Sue: (unsure) Well...

(Samantha then comes over and snatches Strawberry Sue's hat off her head)

Strawberry Sue: Hey!

Samantha: Relax, Sue. It'll only be for tonight. (places the hat under the sheets of Strawberry Sue's dessert cart)

Strawberry Sue: But that hat makes me like my heroine, Strawberry Shortcake!

Jamie: Sue, relax. It's just until we leave the party.

Phil: Yeah, it's not like it's the end of your sugar and sweets infested world. Besides, Lucien would recognize us immediately in our usual get-up.

Samantha: (pulls out two hair scrunchies) In the meantime, put these on.

(Samantha comes over to Strawberry Sue, and places the scrunchies on each side of her hair, making it into pig-tails.)

Strawberry Sue: Thanks, Sam. Not that I needed my hair braided, but this'll do.

Jamie: Great. Now with that settled, let's go in.

(Phil, Samantha and Strawberry Sue nod to him, and follow Jamie to the entrance. As they walk there, the camera switches to Lucien III, greeting another guest.)

Lucien III: (joyous) Welcome to my party! Please relax and enjoy the festivities!

(as the guest walks in, the caterers, who, unknown to Lucien are Jamie, Phil, Samantha and Strawberry Sue, come towards the entrance. As they make their way in, Lucien holds his hand up and stops them.)

Lucien III: Hold it! Now, are all four of you the caterers?

Jamie: (in a disguised voice) Why, yes. Yes, we are. We're from the "Pilaf Catering Services of Staten Island".

Lucien III: Oh, you must be the new caterers. The ones from Felume Flambé weren't very good.

Phil: (in a disguised voice) But aren't they the best catering service in town?

Lucien: They're not the best to me. Now go along, people; we need the food for the party.

Jamie/Phil/Samantha/Strawberry Sue: (together) Yes, sir.

(they then push their carts in, and enter the party. As they pass through, Snake walks by, and catches a glimpse of them bringing in the food)

Snake: (w/ a hungry stare) Wow! Hey, Lucien! Isn't that the food for tonight's party?

Lucien III: Yes, but the caterers are a little too familiar.

Snake: (confused) Huh?

Lucien III: Don't they all look like a certain bunch of rejects back at school?

Snake: Well, I'm not sure, boss.

Lucien III: Well go keep an eye on them, Slither. They may be up to something.

Snake: (salutes Lucien) Aye, sir.

Lucien III: (surprised) I didn't know you were Scottish.

(Snake just glances to the camera in annoyance)

>>186669
(switch to Jamie and the others, as they get into the backyard, which is where the party is taking place. As they get there, they stop in their tracks and look in awe.)

Jamie: Hallelujah! We're in party paradise!

(camera pulls back to reveal that the party is in full swing. The camera takes several shots of the party as we see the students of Tottenville High having a good time, dancing, and eagerly waiting for the food. Cut back to Jamie, Phil, Samantha and Strawberry Sue as they look on with awe.)

Strawberry Sue: This must be what Heaven is like!

Phil: You said a mouthful, Sue.

Veronica: (off-screen) Hey you!

(Jamie and the others then snap out of their trance and turn to Veronica, who is waiting for the food)

Veronica: (pushy) It's about time you guys got the food here. We were, like, almost starving to death here.

Phil: (disguises his voice ala Arnold Schwarzenegger) Um, vell ve vere late due to some traffic. No harm done.

Samantha: (also disguising her voice) Yeah, we hit some traffic. But the food is okay.

Veronica: Whatever. Just put the food over there. (points to an unseen spot) Just don't spill the food while you're on your way.

(Jamie and his friends nod to Veronica and they make their way to put the food at the tables. As they pass Veronica, she gets a feeling as Jamie passes her. She then looks back them as they walk away.)

Veronica: (in thought) Hey. Isn't that Jamie Willis? (smiles mischievously to herself) And I thought he couldn't be any braver.

(we switch back to Jamie, Phil, Samantha and Strawberry Sue as they make their way towards the tables. Jamie and Phil then stop to see a band as they introduce themselves to the crowd, as the camera switches to the band.)

Lead Singer: Hello, Plumtree residence! My name is Gordon G. Baetz! Along with me are my guitar guys, Steve Plantaganet and Lyles Grayson! And on the drums, we have Skeeter O'Neill! We are... (rises fist in the air) The Private Eyes! (to his band mates) Hit it! (his group starts to sing "Private Eyes", their band namesake, by Hall & Oates) (singing w/ group) Private eyes! (claps) They're watching you! (claps twice)

(switch back to Jamie and Phil, as the band is performing)

Phil: (amazed) Wow! So far, out of the Hall & Oates cover bands I've listened to in high school, these guys are way better than The Maneaters!

Jamie: But what about One on One and the Rich Girl Band?

Phil: Pfft! Oh please! I'm so over those guys!

Samantha: (off-screen) Hey guys! (Jamie and Phil then turn their heads towards Samantha and Strawberry Sue, in which the camera pans towards them) You can't stand around here! People will get suspicious. Let's bring the food to the tables before Lucien finds out!

(cut back to Jamie and Phil)

Jamie: Oh, shoot! Come on, Phil! We'll ask the Private Eyes for an encore later!

Phil: Right! (rushes back to Samantha and Sue along with Jamie)

(at that moment, switch to inside the van, where we see Nick and Jade at what appears to be a control room, watching over the party, checking up on how Jamie and the others are doing.)

Jade: Yo, Nick. Anything, like, happened to Jamie and the others yet?

Nick: (looking up at the surveillance monitors) Nyet. Nothing's happening yet. As far as I know, Lucien hasn't gotten suspicious yet.

Jade: Are you sure you know what you're doing?

Nick: Of course I do. Shades and Teshawn are waiting for my cue to- (cuts himself off as he sees a car pulling up on the driveway) What the hell?

Jade: What's wrong, Nick? (gets up from her seat and leans by Nick for a closer look)

Nick: A car just pulled up by Lucien's mansion.

Jade: (recognizes the car) Wait a minute. That car looks familiar.

Nick: How would you know?

Jade: I pass by the parking lot on my way to school.

(they then look closer to see who's stepping outside of the car. Of course, the viewers don't see this. When Jade and Nick finally see who stepped out of the car, they look on with shock.)

Jade: (shocked) What the hell? (looks closer) Has she gone into a Bow-Head?

>>186672
(all Nick can do right now is shrug on her comment, since he is still new on the phrases. Switch to inside the Plumtree mansion, where Lucien III is talking to some guests. As he is talking, we hear a knock on the door)

Lucien III: Oh, that must be the pizza delivery boy. Excuse me for one moment, please.

(he then goes to the door and opens it. As he opens it, he gets the shock of his life. As who should step in, it's Principal Gilliam and Vice Principal Sopus, both wearing teenage styled outfits. Ariel is dressed up like Madonna at the end of the Borderline video, complete with a big bow on her hat along with fishnet stocking gloves, black leather jacket, blue acid-washed jeans and black boots. Graham, however, is wearing an outfit similar to Taco in his Puttin' on the Ritz video. Both of them are trying to fit in.)

Vice Principal Sopus: (trying her best to sound cool) This party is totally awesome... to the MAX! (waits for Principal Gilliam to say something, then nudges him to get him into it)

Principal Gilliam: (gets himself together) Oh, oh, oh! Um, this party is really bitchin'! Where all my homeboys at?!

(Lucien and his two guests can only look at the two officials in utter shock and embarrassment. The silence goes on, save for the ceaseless chatter in the background, until Lucien says something to the officials.)

Lucien III: What in the hell are you two doing here?

Vice Principal Sopus: Isn't it obvious? We just came by to see how things are going.

Principal Gilliam: Yes, and to see how the students are enjoying the party.

Lucien III: Yes, I understand. But those outfits. Why did you have to dress up like something out of a Madonna video?

Vice Principal Sopus: Hey, my daughter was into it. So I decided to try it out.

Principal Gilliam: And don't have a cow on me, Plumtree. I happened to see Taco's video on MTV as I was selecting this outfit.

Lucien III: But Principal Gilliam, with all due respect, Taco's a one-hit wonder. He's over!

(at that moment, Snake walks by)

Snake: Hey Lucien, no sign of- (then notices Graham and Ariel in their outfits) No way! They're here?

Lucien III: (turns to Snake) Apparently, they are trying to fit in for some reason.

Vice Principal Sopus: (aside to Principal Gilliam) This plan is going perfectly. These two don't expect a thing.

Principal Gilliam: (aside) Yes, that I understand, Ariel. But what if they suspect us for researching their surroundings?

Vice Principal Sopus: (aside) Don't worry about it. LaTour should be proud of us.

(as they were talking, Lucien whispers something to Snake. As he whispers, Snake nods his head. They then finish and turn towards Graham and Ariel.)

Lucien III: Mr. Gilliam, Mrs. Sopus; me and Snake here have been talking about your arrival, and I thought it best for one of us to let you go around. (to Principal Gilliam) That would be you, sir.

Principal Gilliam: (points to himself) Me?

Lucien III: Of course, sir. (to Vice Principal Sopus) And I think that Snake should give you a tour of the party.

Vice Principal Sopus: You really mean it?

Lucien III: Of course. (to Snake) Snake?

Snake: (snickers to himself) With pleasure, Lucien.

(Snake then guides Vice Principal Sopus through the party as Principal Gilliam decides to mingle with the students. Switch to the backyard, where we see Jamie and Samantha looking around as the party is in full swing.)

Samantha: Wow. Great party isn't it?

Jamie: Yeah. But it doesn't compare to Strawberry Sue's birthday party last year. Remember that party, Sam?

Samantha: Oh yeah, of course I did. I still can't believe she still gets birthday parties at fifteen.

Jamie: Well Sue is Sue. She loves those Strawberry Shortcake dolls. And Cabbage Patch Kids.

Samantha: Don't forget that she also likes Care Bears.

Jamie: Oh yeah, thanks for reminding me about that.

Samantha: Still, it's pretty weird that she's still a child at fifteen.

Jamie: Well growing takes a lot of time, and so does maturity.

Samantha: Right. (changes the subject) Anyway, it looks like we've pulled this one off very well. Nobody totally expected us.

???: And I thought Jamie couldn't get any braver, Sam.

(they both go into shock, and turn around to see Veronica behind them and listening to their conversation. Jamie is especially shocked, since Veronica has spoken to him again in one day.)

Jamie: (shocked, stuttering) V-V-V-V-Veronica! How did you-?

Samantha: (annoyed) How did you hear our conversation?

Veronica: (defensive) Well, I was bored, with Lucien hanging around and mingling with the other guests, so I was wondering what you two were talking about.

Samantha: We didn't say anything, Veronica!

Veronica: Oh, really? Then how come you two won't tell me about crashing the party?

Samantha: (shocked out of her wits) What?! You heard us?!

Jamie: (snaps to) Huh? She what?

Veronica: But it's no big. I was actually hoping to see Jamie here tonight. (to Jamie) Isn't that right, Jamie?

(Jamie is still too nervous to say anything, but before he does, Samantha gets in Veronica's face)

Samantha: Listen, rich girl. Jamie is trying to have a good time, and I don't want a slut like you ruining it for him! (makes a fist and puts it up in front of Veronica) You got me?!

Veronica: Take it easy. Like, don't have a cow, Sam. (to Jamie) Anyway Jamie, there is something I really like to talk to you about... in private.

Jamie: (nervous) In... p-p-p-private?

Veronica: Of course, silly. Now come with me. (takes Jamie by the hand and takes him from a dejected Samantha)

>>186673
(switch to the buffet area, where we see Phil and Strawberry Sue getting their food which is the same food they brought in as a distraction)

Phil: Man, this food is great! Who knew the catering van we got had cocktail franks?

Strawberry Sue: (indifferent) Yeah, whatever.

Phil: (concerned) What's wrong?

Strawberry Sue: We've been in this party for like a good hour now, and I still miss my hat!

Phil: Don't worry about it, Sue. As soon as this party's over, we'll sneak out, get your hat under the dessert cart, and you're back to yourself in no time.

Strawberry Sue: I know, but I feel stupid with these pigtails!

Phil: Oh come on, they don't look so bad.

Strawberry Sue: Really?

Phil: Heck no, they just look as cute as those dolls you always carry around. Trust me, I know what cute is; I got a bratty sister for a sibling.

(Strawberry Sue doesn't say anything, but she blushes from Phil's compliment, and gets back to getting her food. As they get the food, they then notice that Principal Gilliam is next to them in line.)

Strawberry Sue: Principal Gilliam?

Phil: Huh? (notices Principal Gilliam) Ack! What are you doing here? And why are you dressed up as Taco? Didn't you know that Taco hasn't been a hit maker he used to be?

Principal Gilliam: (notices Phil and Sue) Hm? Oh, Phil and Strawberry Sue. It's a coincidence that I'm seeing you in this party.

Phil: (nervous, putting his left hand behind his head) Uh, well, you see Mr. Gilliam, we-

Strawberry Sue: (cuts Phil off) We were just excited as you are about this party. But why are you here?

Phil: And where's Mrs. Sopus?

Principal Gilliam: She's with Snake. And to answer your question Miss Taylor, me and Mrs. Sopus are researching on you kids.

Strawberry Sue: (curious) What for?

Principal Gilliam: Well, our superintendent wanted to check up on you students and see what makes you all tick.

Phil: Oh is that so? I thought you were trying to catch me in doing something stupid as usual.

Principal Gilliam: Oh, believe me, Mr. Tuesday, I'm still keeping my eye on you. Just don't mess this one up on Lucien's party, ok?

Strawberry Sue: Um, Mr. Gilliam, we have to be honest about something.

Principal Gilliam: Oh? About what?

(just as Strawberry Sue was about to spill the beans, Samantha, dejectedly, walks by them)

Strawberry Sue: (notices Samantha) Hey, it's Sam! (calls out to her) Hey Sam, over here!

(Samantha ignores Strawberry Sue and continues to walk away. Phil and Strawberry Sue look on, confused on Sam's behavior.)

Phil: Geeze, what crawled up in her hair and died?

Principal Gilliam: I'll ask Miss McAdam myself. (he gets off the buffet line and follows Samantha)

(Meanwhile, we switch to another part of the backyard where we see Ariel Sopus hanging upside down and Snake hitting her like a piñata)

Vice Principal Sopus: (angered) You can't do this to me, Sanford! I can get your freakin' ass expelled!

Snake: ... Wanna bet? (hits her again right above the breasts)

Vice Principal Sopus: Ouch! Hey, my husband plays with those!

(the scene then switches to Samantha sitting alone on the swing set. As she is moping to herself, Principal Gilliam comes over to her. Somehow knowing her problem, Graham tries to help her out.)

Principal Gilliam: Anything wrong, Miss McAdam?

Samantha: (somehow recognizes the voice as Mr. Gilliam) Oh, Principal Gilliam, Jamie is ignoring me and he's always interested in Veronica Baltimore than me.

Principal Gilliam: (sits on the swing next to her) Why is that?

Samantha: Well, for one thing, she's rich, plus she's more beautiful than me, and she even has bigger boobs than I do. She's trying to con him out of his life. It isn't fair. I'm cute, I'm funny, I'm smart...

Principal Gilliam: Maybe Jamie hasn't seen you in those forms. Do you have a crush on him?

Samantha: (silent for a moment, then hangs her head down) Yes. I love Jamie Willis. (sniffs and wipes some tears off her face) But I don't know what to do.

Principal Gilliam: What you need to do is to go up to him, right now, and tell him how you feel. It may be risky, but it's worth it.

Samantha: (looks up at him) Really?

Principal Gilliam: You betcha! (winks his right eye to Samantha)

(Samantha starts to think about it. She then forms a smile across her face. She then gets up and hugs Principal Gilliam)

Samantha: (overjoyed) Oh thank you, Mr. Gilliam. (softly) I love you.

Principal Gilliam: (modest) Don't mention it. (blushes and smiles weakly as the camera goes back a little into a far angle.) ... Um, you can let go of me now.

(switch back to the party, where we see Jamie and Veronica, who is holding a glass of wine cooler, hanging by the pool area. As we can see, she is trying to tempt Jamie.)

Veronica: You know, it may be the wine cooler talking... (spills the drink onto the ground) but I find you very sexy.

Jamie: You do?

Veronica: Of course, silly. Ever since you came into Tottenville High, I had always found you as cute as Nick Rhodes.

Jamie: Nick Rhodes? You think I'm as cute as Duran Duran's keyboardist?

Veronica: Plus you have the likeability of Simon LeBon.

Jamie: (modest) Well, I-

Veronica: (places a finger on his lips) Shh! Don't be modest. Just... kiss me.

(Jamie and Veronica's lips move slowly as they begin to meet. Switch over to Samantha, searching for Jamie and telling him how she feels. Unfortunately, she finds him, to her shock as the camera switches to Jamie and Veronica as they kiss each other romantically as True by Spandau Ballet begins to play. Switch back to Samantha, whose feelings are so hurt right now, her eyes begin to swell up in tears and her lips quiver, trying not to cry out loud. Switch back to the new couple, as the camera pans halfway upward to reveal Phil standing on a small boat, with his hands behind his back, and his nose stuck high not saying anything as the song continues to play. As he is standing, Lucien and a girl he was just making out to, pop their heads out of the boat. It appears he saw the whole thing.)

Lucien III: (angry) That two-timing Rockefeller skank! (notices Phil on the dinghy) Hey, get off my dinghy! (the girl, thinking he was talking to her, gets up, but Lucien stops her) Not you!

(Commercial Break)

>>186674
(we open where we last left off, with Jamie and Veronica still in their lip lock. They then get interrupted as Lucien III taps on Jamie's shoulder.)

Lucien III: Hey, you little dipstick! Who the hell gave you the right to kiss my girl?!

Jamie: On the contrary, Lucien, (takes off his hat to reveal himself) I do have the right!

Lucien III: (shocked/angered) What the?! You?! I thought I didn't invite you punks and to not step foot in my mansion!

Jamie: Oh, give me a break, rich boy! I came here to be with Veronica, and to show her what real love is!

Lucien III: Love?! What do you know of love?!

Jamie: (gets in Lucien's face) Plenty, Plumtree!

(suddenly, Veronica separates them from killing each other)

Veronica: Stop it, you two! Stop it! Can't you two just get along? I don't mind you two being rivals for my heart, but this? Oh! (walks away in a huff, leaving Jamie and Lucien III alone)

Lucien III: Nice going, commoner!

Jamie: (crosses his arms together) Hmph!

(switch to the eating tables, where we see Phil and Strawberry Sue eating their food. Phil has a load of cocktail weenies while Sue has some French pastries. As they eat, a saddened Samantha passes by them, and sits on the table next to them.)

Strawberry Sue: (notices Samantha) I wonder what's wrong with Samantha?

Phil: Well she looks kinda down. Have any ideas on getting it out of her?

Strawberry Sue: Well, I did bring my friend along.

(Sue goes into her pocket and takes out a little Strawberry Shortcake hand puppet. She then goes over to Samantha, and places the puppet beside her, hoping to cheer her up.)

Strawberry Sue: (as puppet) Hello, Samantha. I'm Strawberry Shortcake from Strawberry Land. It seems like you have a problem. What's wrong, Samantha? Do you feel all alone?

Samantha: ...Yes, I do feel alone. I just saw Jamie kiss that [CENSORED]ing slut, Veronica. And I was just about to tell him how much I cared.

Strawberry Sue: (as puppet) Oh? How can you hide these feelings for so long?

Phil: (aside) Oh boy.

Samantha: (deeply saddened) Ever since me and Jamie had been in elementary school, I've never had the chance to look into the inner spice of my feelings for him. (sniffs up some tears as she slowly starts to cry. As she continues, switch to Jamie sitting around, waiting for his friends) And now Veronica has gotten him into her trap and using him as a trophy, and now I'll never tell him how much I feel. Oh, to stroke his short brown hair... (switches back to Samantha, who is now losing it, and cries out in sadness) I love him so!

Strawberry Sue: (as puppet) Oh, this feels so sad. (makes a crying motion with the puppet) Especially how you've hidden these feelings for so long.

(then, without saying anything, Samantha hands Strawberry Sue an old-fashioned cell phone.)

Samantha: (sorrow) Here. Take this. I know I should have just stayed in the Teen Chat Line tonight, but I wanted to go to this party instead. (looks up at Phil and Sue, with tears rolling down her face) Can you guys take my place? I just feel like being alone right now. (buries her head back into her arms)

Strawberry Sue: (puts the puppet away) It's okay, Sam. It's o- (Phil stops her) Huh?

Phil: Come on, Sue. Let's leave her alone for a while.

(Strawberry Sue quietly nods to Phil, and both of them leave Samantha alone. Switch to another part of the party where Lucien III has dragged Snake in for some reason.)

Snake: Now what's wrong, Lucien?

Lucien III: It's Jamie. He and his friends have crashed the party! Right under our noses for God's sakes!

Snake: They did? Wow, they're good.

Lucien III: Don't encourage them, man! I want their poor asses out of here, and I want you to do something about it right NOW!!!

Snake: (holds his hands up in defense) Ok, ok. Just let me find some of my gang members and we'll get right on it.

Lucien III: You'd better; or your ass is mine!

>>186677
(switch the pool area, where they are going to meet with Jamie. All of a sudden, the cell phone Samantha gave to Strawberry Sue starts to ring.)

Strawberry Sue: (hears the phone ringing) It's Sam's cell phone. Should we answer it?

Phil: Well, she was supposed to be in the Teen Chat Line, so I guess we have to help her out on this.

(Sue nods to Phil, and answers the phone, then putting the phone on her ear)

Strawberry Sue: (cheery) Hello! Welcome to the Teen Chat Line! How may I help you?

(the voice on the other end is a female, whom Strawberry Sue doesn't recognize yet)

Female Voice: (on the other end) Hi. Um, first off, I can remain anonymous?

Strawberry Sue: (nods her head) Mmm-hmm. Of course you can.

Female Voice: (on the other end) Oh, good. Anyway, I have this problem with two boys that I like. One likes me, and I like the other. The problem is, I can't figure out who to go out with; the popular rich kid or the semi-popular middle class boy?

(as Sue is listening, she turns her head towards her right, and looks in the window. To her shock and anger, the person calling her is Veronica, unsure if she can either go out with Jamie or Lucien III. She looks at her through the window in anger, since she brought Samantha into sorrow, then gets back on the phone in mock kindness and gives her some advice.)

Strawberry Sue: (mock kindness) Go out with the rich kid. He can get you lots of money. Oh, and don't floss your teeth. Got that?

(switch to inside the mansion, where Veronica is at, as she writes all this down)

Veronica: Well, a girl does have to make some sacrifices...

(switch back to Strawberry Sue, giggling to herself. That is, until she and Phil see Jamie nearby, waiting for Veronica to make up her mind. Then, in sympathy, she changes her mind about what she wants Veronica to do.)

Strawberry Sue: (sympathetic) On second thought, go with the middle class boy; he's worth more than money. (pauses) And flossing gives your gums a healthier look. (hangs up and looks back at Jamie) What have I done?

Phil: Relax, Sue. At least we made Jamie happy.

Strawberry Sue: But we made Sam even more miserable.

Phil: Oh, right. Hey, can I have a shot on that?

Strawberry Sue: (hands Phil the cell phone) Sure, knock yourself out.

(as Phil waits for another call, Strawberry Sue thinks about something. Suddenly, a thought balloon pops up by her head, and Samantha's head pops up in the thought balloon.)

Samantha: (in thought balloon) Sue, when you take my place on the Teen Chat Line, make sure Phil doesn't screw this up. Got it?

(suddenly, the thought balloon bursts, and Strawberry Sue just realized who she just gave the phone to. As this happens, Phil gets on the horn with another desperate teenager.)

Phil: Hello, welcome to the Teen Chat Line. How may I be of service to you?

>>186678
(switch to the caller's home, where the caller, a teenage boy, is sitting on his bed in a depressed state, and decked out in psycho-clique wear, is trying to make himself feel better. This kid is Elliott Grant, one of the outcasts of Tottenville High.)

Elliott: Hello? Do you have a problem talking to kids like me?

(switch back to Phil at the party)

Phil: Nope. Go on. (knowing who this kid is, he sneakily presses the speaker button as Elliott is talking)

Elliott: (on the other end) [depressed] That's good. It's just that since I got rejected to go to Lucien's stupid party, I feel so alone. I just need someone to comfort me in my sorrow, and-

Phil: Yeah, yeah, keep goin'. (snickers to himself; Elliott then hears him, and also the party-goers)

Elliott: (as we cut back to his house) Wait a sec. Am I on speaker phone?

(switch back to the party)

Phil: Hold on. (to the crowd) Hey everybody! Is he on speaker phone?!

Everyone (except Strawberry Sue): NO!

(cut back to Elliott in his room, finding out he'd been had, and realizing who's on the chat line.)

Elliott: Phil Tuesday, how dare you?! (mouth quivers as a single tear rolls down his cheek)

Phil: (on the other end) Hey Elliott, look at it this way; (cut back to the party) Phil Tuesday is anti-violent; not anti-funny. (hangs up on Elliott as Strawberry Sue looks at Phil in embarrassment)

(Switch the front door, where we see some geeks and nerds on the front door. One of them stands out as a nerd, complete with horn-rimmed glasses, pocket protector and other nerdy accessories. This nerdy kid is Dexter Data. He knocks on the door, and Lucien answers.)

Lucien III: Yes?

Dexter: (gives Lucien the Vulcan salute) Greetings, Lucien Plumtree III. My colleagues and I have heard that you are throwing a party tonight in honor of the beginning school year, and we were thinking that we should indulge ourselves into a little bit of partying hearty. (Lucien doesn't say a word, since these nerds are trying to get into his party. Dexter then reaches for something in his pocket) I've brought along my pet anthropomorphic mouse, Cheesefort. (shows the mouse to Lucien. Cheesefort is wearing a top hat and a monocle) I've created him while I was at summer camp.

Cheesefort: (greets Lucien) Top o' the morning, Plumtree!

(again, silence. Lucien then decides what to do with the nerds)

Lucien III: (sarcastic) Oh, you guys came for a party? Well, the one for nerds and retards is just down the street. (points to his left) Have a nice night, science dweebs! (slams the door on their faces)

(switch back to Phil, as he is having fun at the party. He is then interrupted as Strawberry Sue and Samantha come over to Phil with unhappy looks on their faces. Phil then notices them, and hides the cell phone.)

Phil: Oh, hi guys. Listen, about the teen chat line thing; I've tried my best on this, but they just wouldn't budge.

Samantha: Cut the crap, Phil. Sue told me everything. I know I shouldn't trust you. She can be trusted on my post, but you, hell no.

Phil: Come on, Sam. Cut me some slack. I mean, you can't humiliate a guy for doing something wrong.

(on cue, Samantha swipes Phil's belt off his jeans)

Phil: Like I said: you can't humiliate me completely.

Strawberry Sue: Oh? (holds up Phil's boxers. On cue, his jeans fall down, showing his lower half of his nudity. He looks down, but is cool about it.)

Phil: Despite this, I'm still chill. At least there's no one else here to object. (walks off, oblivious to his lower nudity. Strawberry Sue just giggles at the sight. Cut to the bushes, where Elliott, who snucked into the party himself, has seen everything.)

Elliott: (snickers wickedly to himself) Oh there's someone here to object, Tuesday. (chuckles to himself again)

(switch to Jamie and Lucien III, who are waiting for Veronica to make her decision. She then appears, ready for her decision.)

Veronica: Gentlemen, after spilling my most intimate thoughts to an anonymous caller from the Teen Chat Line, I've come to a decision. The man I want to spend the rest of high school...

>>186680
... (links her arm onto Jamie's arm) Jamie Willis.

Jamie: (pumps his arm in satisfaction) Yes! Ronnie's mine! (to Lucien) In your face, Plumtree!

(Lucien III blinks in disbelief, but then develops a wicked smile and chuckles to himself)

Jamie: What's so funny?

Lucien III: Oh, I'm laughing because even though you have Veronica as your own, she is still technically MY girlfriend. Besides, she was drunk off of wine-coolers when she kissed you; she still prefers guys like me.

Jamie: You've got three seconds to take that back!

Lucien: Hmph. (quickly) Fine; one, two, three.

(suddenly, out of nowhere, Snake grabs Jamie from behind and puts him a full nelson. Switch to the dining area as other bullies, from Snake's gang, ambush Phil, Samantha and Strawberry Sue and hold onto them tightly. Switch back to Jamie, as Snake holds onto him tight. Veronica is not happy at this sight.)

Veronica: Lucien, what are you doing to Jamie?!

Lucien III: Simple, Veronica dear. You already know that Jamie and his friends have broken in to our little party and he needs to be punished.

Jamie: You should be the one that needs to be punished, Plumtree! Not letting us be invited; what kind of a sick snob are you?!

Lucien: Sick, you say? Sick? I prefer intelligent.

Jamie: Oh yeah? I prefer you an asshole!

Lucien: (frowns) Squeeze him harder, Snake.

Snake: Yes, boss.

(Snake puts Jamie into a death grip, to which Jamie screams out in pain. Cut to the van, where Jade and Nick are still waiting for anything to happen. They then hear Jamie's cry. They jump up in shock.)

Jade: What was that?!

(Nick turns to the surveillance screen and he and Jade see what's going on)

Jade: Oh my God! Like, Jamie and the others have been caught and they're getting creamed by Lucien and Snake!

Nick: (calls for someone on the communicator) Shades! Teshawn! Attack! NOW!

(cut back to the party as we hear a heavy metal guitar riff. Suddenly, Shades and Teshawn rides into the party on Shades' motorcycle ala Billy Idol in his White Wedding video. As they land, Lucien, Veronica, Snake, and all the party goers look on with shock. Jamie and his friends couldn't be any happier.)

Jamie: (overjoyed) Shades! Teshawn! Boy am I glad to see you guys!

Teshawn: Hey, we're just helping a homie out, you dig?

Lucien III: (indignant) No I don't dig! (to Snake) Get them!

Snake: You got it! (to his crew) Come on, boys! Let's get them!

(Snake's gang members drop Jamie's friends and they get towards Shades and Teshawn. As they get there, Phil, Samantha and Strawberry Sue notice three wine-cooler bottles on one of the tables. They each grab one, and sneak up one each gang member. On cue, they strike their respective slimeball with the bottles, breaking them and knocking them out. As Snake gets distracted by the noise, Jamie elbows him in the stomach, and loosens Snake's grip.)

Jamie: Run!

(Jamie and his friends run off as Shades and Teshawn follow. Lucien and Snake run off after them with Veronica goes after them worried. As they get chased, Jamie and his friends bump into some of the party guests, and apologize to them as they run off. [those lines would be ad-libbed.] As the chase goes on, Principal Gilliam steps out of the crowd, wondering what's going on.)

>>186682
Principal Gilliam: What's going on here? (notices Jamie, Phil, Samantha and Strawberry Sue run by. Jamie greets Principal Gilliam as he runs past him)

Jamie: (quickly) Hi, Mr. Gilliam.

(Gilliam looks on, then sees Shades' motorcycle racing by, with Shades and Teshawn at the wheel. Gilliam jumps out of the way, in order not to get run over himself.)

(as they continue to run away from Lucien and Snake, Jamie eyes the dessert cart.)

Jamie: It's the dessert cart. C'mon guys! Hop in!

(when they reach the dessert cart, Jamie, Samantha and Strawberry Sue get on as Phil pushes them out of the party. As they gain up with Shades and Teshawn, Phil hops on the cart, but not before grabbing something from the bottom. It turns out to be Sue's trademark Strawberry Shortcake hat. He shows it to her as they make their escape.)

Phil: Is this yours, ma'am?

(Sue, overjoyed to have her hat back, grabs the hat and puts it back on.)

Phil: How's about a hug?

(Strawberry Sue hugs him as her way of saying 'thank you'.)

Jamie: Can we save this for later? Lucien and Snake are gaining up on us!

Samantha: No need, Jamie! Look! (points towards the door) We're home free!

(just as she says that, two other preppie kids, friends of Lucien's, begin to close the door.)

Strawberry Sue: (fearful) We're not gonna make it!

(on cue, Shades and Teshawn ride by)

Shades: Oh, yes we will!

(with a signal from Shades, Teshawn grabs onto the cart, so that they can follow them to safety. They then reach the door and escape as the doors get closed. Lucien and Snake made it as they escaped)

Lucien III: (angry) Dammit! And I was so close to punishing those dweebs!

(cut to the backyard as the students, including Principal Gilliam, look on with shock by this situation. As he watches along with his students, a beaten-up Ariel comes up to Gilliam. It appears that Snake used her as a piñata for a while now. He then notices Ariel behind him)

Principal Gilliam: Oh, it's you, Ariel. Great party, isn't it?

(Ariel then falls down on her face as Gilliam watches her fall)

(cut to the next day. Jamie and his friends are talking on their way to school)

Jamie: You know, with the exception of Lucien trying to kill us for crashing his party, everything went great.

Phil: Yeah, that party was bitchin'. Too bad I missed the Private Eyes' encore.

Teshawn: Gordon and his group goes to our school, Einstein.

Phil: Oh yeah.

Samantha: (to Nick) And we have you to thank for helping us out in that situation.

Nick: (modest) Well, you know...

Samantha: (to Jamie) So I guess you and Veronica are a couple now, right?

Jamie: Well, I'm not sure. It might've been for last night only.

Samantha: Don't worry about it, Jamie. I'm sure there's a girl that likes you somewhere.

(as she says this, they are by the school. As they get there, Strawberry Sue notices something completely painted on the school wall)

Strawberry Sue: Hey guys! Look at what Elliott drew!

(the gang looks on, and Phil gasps in shock. Pan to the wall as it turns out the picture Elliott painted on the wall shows Phil naked, with Elliott's head blocking the lower bits from view. Every student who saw this laughs their asses off. It also says "Phil Tuesday: No problem too SMALL" emphasizing the picture's point. Cut back to Phil, who looks on with shock, then narrows his eyes)

Phil: (unhappy) I hate this school.

>>186683
(as Jamie and the others watch on, Lucien III and Veronica pass by. Lucien only glances at Jamie, but Veronica, unseen by Lucien, passes Jamie something. Jamie then looks at it, finding out that it's a note. He then reads the note)

Veronica: (voice-over) "Jamie, that was a nice piece of bravery you showed at Lucien's party last night. I love it. Love, Veronica Baltimore."

(Jamie then looks up at the couple. Switch to his view as he see them walking. Veronica then turns her head to him, smiles, and winks at Jamie. Switch back to Jamie, as he smiles in satisfaction)

Jamie: You know, Sam. You may be right. (walks ahead of the pack)

Samantha: (clutches her forehead) Ugh. Why me?

Shades: Relax, Sam. Someday, Jamie will be yours. Just not today.

Phil: Or ever, in Veronica's case. (laughs at Samantha before she kicks him in the head) (in pain) Ow.

(end teaser)

Narrator: Next week, on a very special Life in the 80s... (first scene shows Jamie and Lucien III fighting it out on the student council elections) Who will win the school election for the new student body president? (next scene shows Phil waving to the audience) What crazy antics will Phil Tuesday pull off? (final scene shows us... Weird Al Yankovic) And what will Weird Al, big novelty artist of the eighties do in this episode?

Weird Al: Hey, you zany wacky nutty funsters! I'll see you on Life in the 80s!

Starring

Anthony LoGatto
Wayne Grayson
Amy Birnbaum
Eric Stuart
Veronica Taylor
Tayo Smart
Emerald Cotton
Darren Dunstan
Lisa Ortiz
Addie Blaustein
Megan Hollingshead

Also Starring

Sal Denise
Debbie Rabbai
Tara Jayne
Autumn Harvest
Jerry Lobozzo
Marc Thompson
Ted Lewis
Andrew Rannells
J.T. Ross

This is how I picture all of A-Log's Life in the 80s characters.

I'm confused. Is this supposed to a sitcom with live actors or an animated thing akin to Family Guy?

>>186690
I think it's supposed to be a sitcom.

  >>186662

1:50 in vid related.

>>186753
So, just like Chris, A-Log steals jokes from other stuff and sticks them in his own work too.

There's another one for the list of similarities...

>Teshawn and Jade.

>two black kids, one male, one female, standing by a boom box playing a rap song. The first black kid is wearing a leather jacket, ADIDAS without the laces, a black backwards baseball cap, and dresses like Run DMC. He is doing some break dancing moves near his boom box.

>Teshawn: (stops break dancing) Jamie! What's up, my homie!

ohhhhh myyyyy godddddd

>>186757

He ripped off Clone High (MTV, 2003) in his sitcom ("finished in 2003") more times than I care to count. Basically he stole the whole first episode. Seriously, after reading it, watch the first episode on youtube.

Fucking spasm.

  >>186778
But A-Log is totally NOT a racist. Skip to 1:30.


See!

>>186661
>(switch to another pair of girls; this time, it's twins. They both have black hair, but the only difference is that they're wearing separate clothes and different hairstyles. The first twin has on a blue jacket and skirt with her hair having a circle loop on her left side. The other twin has a red jacket and skirt with her hair also in a loop, but on the right side.)

>Twin #2: So Mei, what has mom made for our lunch?

>Mei (Twin #1): Mom has made me sushi. How about you, Lei?

>Lei (Twin #2): I got some pork-fried rice, orange juice in a thermos and mom's breast enlargement pills.

>Mei: (confused) Why did you need those pills for?

>Lei: (pops one into her mouth) Well it's for the boys, duh. (drinks her orange juice and swallows the pill) Mom wants us to look our best. (all of a sudden, her breasts get a little larger along with a 'pop' sound from each one. Mei, her sister, couldn't help but laugh. Switch to Jamie, Phil and Samantha, who just saw the twins as they pass by)

>Jamie: Man, one of the Hirochan Twins is letting herself go!

Oh, A-Log...

Well, that was the dumbest fucking thing I have ever read in my life.

>>186840
then you haven't been on /cwc/ for very long

I honestly dont know where to start about how bad that was. The bland stereotypical characters clearly taken from every high school movie, the generic plotline, an over reliance on references and nostalgia for humor, and not being funny or original in any way, shape, or form.
tl;dr It sucked and wasn't funny

>>186848
Anyone thinking that the closest character that even resembled ALOG in the slightest was the childish character who still plays with dolls and is obsessed with Strawberry Shortcake? Just change the gender and replace Strawberry Shortcake, Care Bears, and Cabbage Patch Kids with Samurai Pizza Cats, Sonic, and Cartoon Moms.

>>186851
Actually, A-Log likes Strawberry Shortcake.

>>186753
>>186848
I'm really shocked by how blatant A-Log's ripping off of Clone High was, but it's apparent from reading that that A-Log really doesn't have any idea how humor works.

A lot of Clone High's humor comes from historical references so stuff is much funnier if you know the context. A-Log clearly gets the joke on the lowest level possible, then changes it to make it utterly generic and lessens the comedic results even more.

>>186817
It was then they both drooled over my massive monster six-inch fox dick.

>>186692
>>186690
Im not sure if its supposed to be a live action sitcom or animated because in the cast list are several voice actors (including A-Log himself who recives top billing) so it makes me think that this is supposed to be animated, you know just like Clone High

Is this an actual project that A-Log genuinely intended to pitch?

Because surely he must've known that someone would notice his plagiarism? Especially if he intended it to be an animated series - just like Clone High.

>>186119
I don't think John ever professed a hatred of Chris. Probably since he, not having the 'persons, realized that he had no stake in Chris.

>>186886
No. John actually found out about A-Log through his hatred of Chris. He was looking up rants and commentaries on him and that's how he befriended A-Log. But I think A-Log's obsession with Chris kind of killed it for John.

>>186887
Well, I guess I'm a dumb fuck.

>>186889
It's all cool.

>>186887
i thought they met through their love of fatfuck920, hence spacehomo/spazzyben/other twats similar repertoire of shitty rant videos

Doesn't SpaceScreaminJohn run the Hellsing920 archive?

>>186953
This will clear things up.

ITT: troll shield enablers

>>187042

All ween kahntent on /cwc/ comes from troll shielding spurglords. Learn to deal with it.

I honestly think I've been more entertained by Sonichu than A-Log's pilot.

The dialogue is so hackneyed ans stiff that it's difficult to even get through the first few sentences.

>>187177

a-log did something chris has never done: actually make me angry. his pilot so bad, so mind-numbingly dull and juvenile that i honestly couldn't finish it. the idea that he wants to actually to it out to the general public is irritating.

and for a show titled "Life in the 80s", there's really not much to do with the decade. I mean, there are a lot of props from the time that get mentioned, but they never get interacted with and the dialogue is modern (excluding the racial stereotype).

Here are the problems i have with A-Log's script just from reading up to the first commercial break:

- Thirteen characters are introduced within the first act, and we never really get a chance to care about any of them.
- No real development is given to any of the characters. Most of the time, their entire personality is summed up in once sentence.
- The characters are all flat amalgamations of various movie/television show cliches.
- The two black characters are ridiculously stereotypical and poorly written.
- The characters' wardrobe is constantly described in overly explict detail.
- All the characters' names are ridiculous and fake sounding. (Shades Chiodo? What the fuck?)
- Most of the jokes are stolen from Clone High.
- The jokes not directly stolen from Clone High are incredibly forced and unfunny.
- Dialouge is stiff and mostly expository. Characters narrate their motivations and backstorys out loud, in the most awkward ways possible.
- The dialouge that isn't expository is remarkebly terrible. The the conversations are structured suggests A-Log hasn't ever been in an actual conversation.
- The way the characters behave and interact with each other feels completely wrong. Situations don't naturally play out like this. The scene with Snake Slither is the perfect example.
- The authority figures act completely backwards. What kind of teacher just does nothing while a student interupts a classmate and insults five several other students?
- The pacing is completely awful, events move along in a sloppy and broken manner.
- Despite billing itself as a parody, the entire thing plays out completely straight.

>>187212
Not to mention

>Writing commercial breaks into your script

>Phil Tuesday

WTF kind of name is that?

Asian twins, 2003, one year after Goldmember....

  one of johns fans

>>186976
Yup.

>>186976 No, I don't run the "HellsingArchive" YouTube account.

>>187280
What kind of a name is Lucien III? Or Shades Chiodo? Or Starwberry Sue?

Shit, even names like "Simonla" or "Zapina" are better than this.

I know how this is gonna sound, but i kiiiind of want to take A-Log's script and rewrite it.

I keep reading through it (but never getting too far because the writing is just so insipid) and thinking up little ways to improve it that i think would make it tolerable, or even slightly entertaining.

I'm not a very good writer, but i think i could get it all the up from unspeakable awful to just regularly bad.

>>187406
You mean you want to re-write the clone high episode.

>>187360
To be fair to A-Log (WHY?), Strawberry Sue is explained as a nickname. A stupid nickname, but at least not a birth name.

>The cute brunette is Samantha McAdam, and the Strawberry Shortcake obsessed girl is Susie Taylor, better known to her friends as Strawberry Sue.

>>186817
I like how A-Log has Japanese twins eating sushi and pork-fried rice. Because that's what Japanese people eat, right?

I'm surprised the black kids weren't eating fried chicken and warty melons and the Russian didn't have a craving for sandviches.

So John, when are you going to release the messages with A-Log showing his reaction?

So John, has A-Log contacted you ever since you gave us all of these cocks?

Originally, I was not going to share this with /cwc/ because...well...deep down, I did feel a little bit of sympathy for A-Log after reading his response.

And then NeuGristle87 leaked nudes, which just reaffirmed (to me) that distancing myself from the group is the right decision.

So here's his first response...

Here's his second response...

A little something extra...

And another about NeuGristle87...

  >>188602
How does he expect to get a radio job when he stutters on every other word?

>>188601
Jeez, does he think you guys are married or something?

>>188601
So, he's going to comedy classes?

Does A-Log not realize that comedy is not something that can be learned? You either have a sense of humor and a comedic eye for things or you don't. And in his case, he's not even close.

>>188602
>Find out what radio station this is.
>E-mail A-Log's foxdick fapfics to the station ahead of his audition
>???
>Profit!

>>188603
>NeuGristle leaked nudes of himself to us "for the lulz"

Haha, oh wow. Either NeuGristle is stupider than I thought or he's trying to cover up his massive fuck ups by saying it was all "for teh lulz"

>>188600
>but at least
There's that phrase again

>>188603
Consider this...

How would A-Log be able to definitely ascertain that the man in those nude pictures was indeed NeuGristle? Does A-Log have prior, intimate knowledge of what NeuGristle looks like naked?

>>188620
It would be the only time either of them see any boobs that's not from viewing hentai, rule 34, or from going onto a free porn site.

>>188603
Wow, neugristle, you sure got us with your lulz. You puppet master, you.

>>188633
I know what you mean, man. Boy, do I feel stupid.

>>188601
>I doubt my reputation online was in jeopardy because I haven't been banned on any of the sites I've been to

WWOEC, FurAffinity and DeviantArt are known to be places of faultless repute, certainly not populated by the dregs of Internet perversion and homosexual deviantry.

>>188603
I knew that Space and Neu are still Alog's little buddies...

>>188637
They aren't. A-Log is just too dumb to realize it, basically.

>>188652
I still think Nue is trying to play both sides of the fence.

>>188653
That's unlikely. He's trying to get info from A-Log to help out his massive failure that is his Q&A.

>>188654
I didn't say he was being sneaky or smart about it.

So John, how close were you to Pikachu0Z? Is there any interesting shit you've got on him?

Actually, as far as I'm aware, Pikachu0z isn't actually a part of A-Log's gang.

To be honest, while he's a pathetic troll shielder in his own right, I don't really think he has any place in that particular article.

If anything he should be in the Youtube Commentaries article.

It makes me feel awful that someone would be willing to be in some weird trollshielding group where A-Log was the de facto leader.

>>188920

A lot of people are eager to slap anyone remotely related on that page. As far as I'm aware, Pikachu0Z had very minor, if any, contact with A-log.

I wouldn't take him out of anything, but in the future, maybe let's not write up a whole section on someones who's exchanged a whole 4 YouTube comments with Mr 6-inch.

>>188811

No. Pikachu0Z and I hardly talk to each other on YouTube, and we had a couple of text chats on Skype, but they weren't interesting to share.

So are you going to drop some nudes like NeuGristle did or fucking what?

>>188966

Are A-Log and Pikachu0Z friends? Have they ever chatted with each other on skype?

>>188982

Don't know. My guess is that they probably do on some occasion, but I don't have evidence to support that.

The times that I ever talk to Pikachu0Z on Skype, it's usually in a group text chat. And he's always busy talking to some other commentators and I'm busy talking to A-Log and whoever else is with us.

>>189337

Are there any people in A-Log's circle jerk that have remained under the radar?

>>189365
Anyone circle jerking A-log tends to make a lot of autistic rants and commentary videos, so I doubt it.

John, are there any people in A-Log's circle jerk that we aren't aware of?

>>189495 He and I never met IRL, since we live on opposite ends of the country (him New York, me California).

>>189684 If there are, I don't know them. Sorry.

Hi John, any new cocks?

Unless John has some fresh cocks for us, this thread should be archived.

Please mods, archive this thread.

John, how does A-Log feel about Chris losing his virginity?

>>188601

A-Log coming to California? Is California his lounge room because I'm pretty sure that's as far as he's gonna fuckin get before he realizes he can't even afford the plane ticket.

John's not even here any more, is he? He could be lurking, I 'spose.

>>198201
Nobody leaves here. They just say they do and stop posting with names. If you're a big enough sperg to regularly follow Chris, you won't just suddenly have an epiphany and quit lurking altogether.

Please archive, mods.