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No. 1364
>>1362
A legend tells about a horrible being, that stalks unsuspecting little children.
In the maternity ward, the babies are usually slapped on the butt to see if the child yells. The child is healthy if it's fucking pissed off, they say.
But some children never recover from the butthurt of their first day. The butthurt encapsulates deep inside them, without anyone noticing it.
Unaware of it themselves, the children grow up just like all of us.
But they are not normal. Because the butthurt hiding inside them makes them vulnerable to a terrible fate. Sure everyone knows the story of the Snow Queen; a kid gets shards of a magic mirror inside his heart and he becomes an insufferable cunt who becomes charmed by the Queen and so on and so on. It's a little bit same thing with butthurt, but this is true and a better story.
One day it happens. Before so innocent and happy William loses the bright shine in his eyes and becomes quiet. The butthurt inside of him has grown too big and has shadowed the child's soul. William starts to consider life serious business. Then She comes.
"What the hell? 360 degrees is a full circle and not turning away! I'll write him a witty retort."
All these years she has stalked her victim, patiently waiting until the butthurt has blossomed and grown inside him. The time has come, and the victim has left anger turn his anus into a gaping hole. When the poor thing sees her face, it's already too later. Her name is...
Assburger queen
She grabs her victim with her long claws, drops his saggy pants, and grabs a giant burger from her robes...
Queen rises her hand, and forces the burger-
(I'm not trying to translate this spurdo language to English)
"Now you'll stop!"
"Don't you see Mike is having the heatenings*."
"Well you fucking asked."
"Over 9.000 Scovilles."
Something like that.
*Heatening, untranslatable term, means that feeling when you're afraid something vile will happen anytime soon.
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