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939 No. 939
Hey everyone, Cave Johnson here, new owner of Electronic Arts and your new boss. Friends, co-workers, Olympians, you're here because i bought your game company off Craig's List for $50 and a half a ham sandwich. You were that broke. So, who's ready to make some video games?

>I am!

Haha, that eager voice you heard was my lovely assistant, Caroline. She's the new backbone of this company, pretty as a postcard too. Sorry guys, she's married, to video games.

Alright, now that i own the company there's gonna be some big changes: first of all, there's gonna be a lot more games about busting ghosts, and that's mandatory! Haha, but seriously, it really is mandatory, so hop to it.
>> No. 940
Here's a question for all of you: Who is not afraid of no ghosts?

As of now, JC Denton, John Madden, and the entire cast of Mass Effect. Man, those games were dull! Now you may be asking yourself "Cave, we don't even own the rights to Dues Ex?" We didn't, we're committing copyright infringment, and we're damn proud of it! Nobody copyright infringes like EA! That's all, keep programming.
>> No. 941
I am pleased to announce that after a lengthy and tiresome business deal, we've finally secured the rights to Psychonauts 2! Now when Tim Schafer agreed to it, i promised him complete and total creative control, and that's what we're going to give him! Except for the part in his contract which mandates at least two hours of gameplay to revolve around the pursuit and capture of unrurly poltergeists. Now, Tim doesn't know this, so you guys are gonna go have to tell him, and in a big group too because he is significantly more large and dangerous then his photographs would tell you. There's a good chance he may maim and/or kill most of you when you go in there. I'm kidding - i'm not kidding, but you have to go in there anyway, it's in your contract.
>> No. 993
shitty post on a shitty imageboard


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